Long time to decide whether to go out with you: disinterest?

• social_misfit

  21 Mar 06, 09:09

  Hi.
  
  I have been trying to date this gal out. So far she has gone out with me once about 2 weeks ago. And this week, I have tried asking her out again.
  
  I realise that she always have to take some time to decide; she just cannot give me an instantenous answer on the spot whether she wants to go out or not. However, if I SMS her about something else, she reply quite fast within an hour or two. Thus I believe it's not the case that she seldom checks her SMS.
  
  For example, the first time when I asked her out by sending her a SMS on early Friday evening around 6pm, she only replied the next morning around 10am. The 2nd time, I SMSed her last night around 9pm, until now, I have not received any affirmative reply whether it's a go or no-go.
  
  I do wonder if such a behaviour by female signal disinterest and I should tone down a bit on asking her out. If a gal needs time to decide whether to go out with a guy, does this mean disinterest or interest? What's the normal/typical behaviour?
• dragg

  21 Mar 06, 09:15

  she is probably not interested.
  
  i didnt know replying within and hour or two to an SMS is considered fast.
• yoghurt

  21 Mar 06, 09:21

  dere could be 2 possible reasons.
  
  Firstly, she's playin hard to get. dosent wanna seem too easy and dat she's always ready for u anytime u ask her out. wad does her behavior tells u? the way she sms? if she flirts back with u with 'cute' sms-es, she's probably interested but makin it not-so-easy to get her.
  
  Secondly, truth be told, she's simply nt interested, dun wanna hurt u and see u as a buddy, no harm going out if she has nothing to do. dats why she waits and see if anyone else asks her out or if she has other plans b4 she actually agrees to meet u.
  
  it very much depends on her behavior. good luck
• Apollo_sg

  21 Mar 06, 09:28

  try to mix more .... dun pin your hopes too high.
  
  
• elektra

  21 Mar 06, 20:22

  if u want an instaneous answer from her, why dont u jus call and ask ? sms-chat and phone chat are different. obviously she cant let u hold on the phone while she thinks for an hour whether or not to go out wif u.
• Manager433

  21 Mar 06, 20:30

  Originally posted by social_misfit:

  Hi.
  
  I have been trying to date this gal out. So far she has gone out with me once about 2 weeks ago. And this week, I have tried asking her out again.
  
  I realise that she always have to take some time to decide; she just cannot give me an instantenous answer on the spot whether she wants to go out or not. However, if I SMS her about something else, she reply quite fast within an hour or two. Thus I believe it's not the case that she seldom checks her SMS.
  
  For example, the first time when I asked her out by sending her a SMS on early Friday evening around 6pm, she only replied the next morning around 10am. The 2nd time, I SMSed her last night around 9pm, until now, I have not received any affirmative reply whether it's a go or no-go.
  
  I do wonder if such a behaviour by female signal disinterest and I should tone down a bit on asking her out. If a gal needs time to decide whether to go out with a guy, does this mean disinterest or interest? What's the normal/typical behaviour?

  Can I ask u a question? Is this lady a forumite here too?
• browniebaobao

  22 Mar 06, 00:55

  either she's playing hard to get or she dun really feel comfortable gg out with u.
• sinicker

  22 Mar 06, 01:40

  Originally posted by social_misfit:

  ...however, if I SMS her about something else, she reply quite fast within an hour or two. Thus I believe it's not the case that she seldom checks her SMS.
  
  

  
• Delta 5

  22 Mar 06, 01:58

  Originally posted by social_misfit:
  [b]Hi.
  she reply quite fast within an hour or two. Thus I believe it's not the case that she seldom checks her SMS.
  
  [b]

  Ok liaoz... For me a few gals I asked out took around 10 hrs plus to reply
• alexkusu

  22 Mar 06, 06:57

  Depends if she apologize for replying later or not
• losers.inc

  22 Mar 06, 08:47

  cant you just ask whether shes interested in you ? rather than wasting sms and time . zzzzzz .
• gerrykoh

  22 Mar 06, 09:12

  Yes, it means she is not interested.
• Ah Cek

  22 Mar 06, 09:38

  yea, she's not interested. if she is, she will agree on the spot; if not, she will try to cough out reasons......if can't give a good reason, she LL then go out wif u. that's why took so late to reply...
• Fatum

  22 Mar 06, 09:43

  
  it's certainly taking you a long time to realise that she's not interested ..................
  
  
• tiggersgd

  22 Mar 06, 09:46

  1 or 2 hrs thing...unless she is held up in her work or some other things which she clarify when asked, otherwise i don't consider that as fast at all.
  
  secondly, don't think any1 need to take more than half a day to answer a solo (??) outing. most likely not interested in you. and when you guys do go out the previous time, what are the topics that is communicated? how's her reaction towards ur answers n body language etc??
  
  perhaps you should date other women so as to hone your male instincts to be sharper?
  
  have fun dating!
• social_misfit

  26 Mar 06, 23:58

  Originally posted by Manager433:

  Can I ask u a question? Is this lady a forumite here too?

  Hi. Not sure if she frequents this forum too. Btw, who do you suspect her to be?
  
• social_misfit

  27 Mar 06, 00:04

  Originally posted by alexkusu:

  Depends if she apologize for replying later or not

  Hmm. She did. But never gave me a reason though.
• darknessfall

  27 Mar 06, 00:21

  hmn..look further for others..
  just maintain friends with her first..see how it goes...meanwhile, look for other gals...