I want my freedom!
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have a quarrel with my mum yesterday about i wanting to go to Bangkok with my friends (her and her bf) and my bf in Sep. But my mum strongly against it so she scolded me and my friend for inviting me to go Bangkok with her and her bf. Mum even said my friend "People hiao, u also hiao. People go tour with bf why must invite both of u?"
I really cannot stand my mum. i really don't see that there is anything wrong for going for a holiday with my bf. I already 24 and my bf 28. Me and him have been together for 4 yrs. And y must all this sort of nonsense be happening to me? Cannot go chalet, cannot go anywhere that must stay overnight. Cannot go bf's house cannot come back before 12 midnight. Everytime go out with bf very stress, always must go back on time. If fail to do so, she make sure she scold me till i cry for two days before her anger goes off. Although she gives me what i want, she control my freedom. I get things i wanted but not freedom! Even hid my passport so that i cannot get out of the country.
y, y must she be like that.. she knows my bf dun smoke, dun drink, never go pub and all these..
i really wanna to go holiday with my friends and bf
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huh. Why is she ordering u around liddat. at ur age ?
Freedom has a price. Are you willing to pay the price ? -
she very scare anything bad happen to u..thats why cannot stay out late..go far...stay overnights..
scare u kanna piak piak
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Thats care and concern if your mum's shoe. Maybe you can try to understand her, and at the mean time, explain your point of view to her
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You're no longer a kid. Learn to stand up and fight for your own freedom. At least 1 step at a time.Originally posted by melody83:have a quarrel with my mum yesterday about i wanting to go to Bangkok with my friends (her and her bf) and my bf in Sep. But my mum strongly against it so she scolded me and my friend for inviting me to go Bangkok with her and her bf. Mum even said my friend "People hiao, u also hiao. People go tour with bf why must invite both of u?"
I really cannot stand my mum. i really don't see that there is anything wrong for going for a holiday with my bf. I already 24 and my bf 28. Me and him have been together for 4 yrs. And y must all this sort of nonsense be happening to me? Cannot go chalet, cannot go anywhere that must stay overnight. Cannot go bf's house cannot come back before 12 midnight. Everytime go out with bf very stress, always must go back on time. If fail to do so, she make sure she scold me till i cry for two days before her anger goes off. Although she gives me what i want, she control my freedom. I get things i wanted but not freedom! Even hid my passport so that i cannot get out of the country.
y, y must she be like that.. she knows my bf dun smoke, dun drink, never go pub and all these..
i really wanna to go holiday with my friends and bf -
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get married wif your bf
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bring mother to bangkok lah.
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Originally posted by melody83:have a quarrel with my mum yesterday about i wanting to go to Bangkok with my friends (her and her bf) and my bf in Sep. But my mum strongly against it so she scolded me and my friend for inviting me to go Bangkok with her and her bf. Mum even said my friend "People hiao, u also hiao. People go tour with bf why must invite both of u?"
I really cannot stand my mum. i really don't see that there is anything wrong for going for a holiday with my bf. I already 24 and my bf 28. Me and him have been together for 4 yrs. And y must all this sort of nonsense be happening to me? Cannot go chalet, cannot go anywhere that must stay overnight. Cannot go bf's house cannot come back before 12 midnight. Everytime go out with bf very stress, always must go back on time. If fail to do so, she make sure she scold me till i cry for two days before her anger goes off. Although she gives me what i want, she control my freedom. I get things i wanted but not freedom! Even hid my passport so that i cannot get out of the country.
y, y must she be like that.. she knows my bf dun smoke, dun drink, never go pub and all these..
i really wanna to go holiday with my friends and bf
Your mum is probably paranoid - overprotective of her daughter as well as the dignity of the family's name, fearing that should one day things just happened and you got pregnant due to lack of proper protection or common sense.
Your mum is a classic believer of 'I-trust-your-man-but-I-don't-trust-man-in-general'.
The panacea to this plight is of course a marriage.
But meanwhile, what you could do is to expand the boundary of what you can do and cannot do through proper dialogue, communication and trust. She probably needs to know much more about your boyfriend before she could decide if she feel safe putting her daughter in his hand. Probably tons of family dinner, causal meet up in your house, goodwill and stuff to familiarize your mother with this man you are dating.
From there, say if you must be back before 12 midnight, work to stretch until 1 a.m. Then maybe about 3 a.m so on and so forth. Always let your mum know that your boyfriend will ensure the responsibility and safety to bring you back home well and intact.
When you rebel outrageously - chances are, it wouldn't go too well with your mum and she might even think that your rebellious act is instigated by your boyfriend. In the long run, it hurts goodwill and bonds.
You want your freedom, but your mum wants security. Can you work to balance the equation?
Cheers -
Then propose to your bf for his hand in marriage... u already 24, can get married already lah...Originally posted by melody83:have a quarrel with my mum yesterday about i wanting to go to Bangkok with my friends (her and her bf) and my bf in Sep. But my mum strongly against it so she scolded me and my friend for inviting me to go Bangkok with her and her bf. Mum even said my friend "People hiao, u also hiao. People go tour with bf why must invite both of u?"
I really cannot stand my mum. i really don't see that there is anything wrong for going for a holiday with my bf. I already 24 and my bf 28. Me and him have been together for 4 yrs. And y must all this sort of nonsense be happening to me? Cannot go chalet, cannot go anywhere that must stay overnight. Cannot go bf's house cannot come back before 12 midnight. Everytime go out with bf very stress, always must go back on time. If fail to do so, she make sure she scold me till i cry for two days before her anger goes off. Although she gives me what i want, she control my freedom. I get things i wanted but not freedom! Even hid my passport so that i cannot get out of the country.
y, y must she be like that.. she knows my bf dun smoke, dun drink, never go pub and all these..
i really wanna to go holiday with my friends and bf -
She worries for your safety... that's all...
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Good say.Originally posted by Yunhaier: Your mum is probably paranoid - overprotective of her daughter as well as the dignity of the family's name, fearing that should one day things just happened and you got pregnant due to lack of proper protection or common sense.
Your mum is a classic believer of 'I-trust-your-man-but-I-don't-trust-man-in-general'.
The panacea to this plight is of course a marriage.
But meanwhile, what you could do is to expand the boundary of what you can do and cannot do through proper dialogue, communication and trust. She probably needs to know much more about your boyfriend before she could decide if she feel safe putting her daughter in his hand. Probably tons of family dinner, causal meet up in your house, goodwill and stuff to familiarize your mother with this man you are dating.
From there, say if you must be back before 12 midnight, work to stretch until 1 a.m. Then maybe about 3 a.m so on and so forth. Always let your mum know that your boyfriend will ensure the responsibility and safety to bring you back home well and intact.
When you rebel outrageously - chances are, it wouldn't go too well with your mum and she might even think that your rebellious act is instigated by your boyfriend. In the long run, it hurts goodwill and bonds.
You want your freedom, but your mum wants security. Can you work to balance the equation?
Cheers -
faint.. i tink i could probably convince my mother to let me go to malaysia with my frens and im only 16 this year.
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then make her trust u la
compromise lo -
because you forgotten to make your stand
this is a whining thread -
haha my mom was also like that, last time refused to let me go out wif my dear after 7pm But after I introduced him to my parents and he got pretty familiar with them, they relented and now I could go out with him until around 10pm le Also they let me stay over at his place a few times after they got to know him quite well...
So what Yunnie said is right, need to have a lot of meet-ups between your bf and your parents, can just ask him to bring them to dinner, then when he comes over dun just head straight to your room, sit around and chat with your mom if she is around. Can also help out in the kitchen if your mom is cooking sth for all of you, big bonus points
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u r 24???
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dats not acceptable.. TS not talking abt her boss or wad lei.. it's her mum she's talking about.Originally posted by Devil1976:You're no longer a kid. Learn to stand up and fight for your own freedom. At least 1 step at a time.
TS: I think you should talk to your mother nicely abt the issues she's concerned about and let her noe ur intentions and solutions to your mother's concern. maybe phonecall everynite over in bangkok? or start w chalet first.. then slowly move up the ladder.. -
it is not that easy to make a stand hor, esp with your parents...Originally posted by allentyb:
because you forgotten to make your stand
this is a whining thread
she still needs to live together with them one, if make her stand in the wrong way, her mom will prolly give her hell... -
every family is different.. so shouldn't compare.Originally posted by kristovorus:faint.. i tink i could probably convince my mother to let me go to malaysia with my frens and im only 16 this year.
IMHO, i feel 16 is too young to go msia.. msia esp JB is VERY unsafe.. -
not very unsafe la...i have been here for more than 20 years liao but still survivingOriginally posted by ahhaoz:every family is different.. so shouldn't compare.
IMHO, i feel 16 is too young to go msia.. msia esp JB is VERY unsafe.. -
Maybe your parent is really concern about you and your safety.
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my mum also like dat....my frends invited me to kopitiam n makan only..nvr smoke nvr drink....only tinted hair..say ppl beng i also wanna beng.... haiz... get used to it man...their way of concern sometimes abit ...haywire... lolx
*tian xia di mama dou shi yi yang di oh oh oh~~~~ -
how is the relationship btw your bf and your mum?
its quite important you know...