Originally posted by de_middle:how's the relationship![]()
Don't do it... It's one in a million chance you'll be happy living with in-laws.Originally posted by tutu2:anybody has no choice but to let them live with you ?
dunno....seems like my future MIL looks coolOriginally posted by tutu2:
what do you mean ? Relationship w PIL okay lor..not very close type, just like last time par tor time.cos they not used to staying w me![]()
as long as nvr clash okie lah...Originally posted by tutu2:
what do you mean ? Relationship w PIL okay lor..not very close type, just like last time par tor time.cos they not used to staying w me![]()
Yeah good and bad.Originally posted by gerrykoh:I lived with PIL.
There are advantages & disadvantages.
Advantages- My PIL helps looks after my kids, fetch them from sch., discipline them, run errands & do household repairs.
Disadvantages- My father-in-law is a MCP, likes things his way. Lectures everyone. He is also collector of rubbish.
I'm looking after MIL now. She doesn't want to live with my other sisters-in-law cos they are fussy & have young kids. I don't mind cos she is easier to get along.
Your household has some serious power struggle going on.Originally posted by mistyblue:Yeah good and bad.
my MIL says things without thinking and creates a number of quarrel between us one of which my husband wanted a divorce and we are not even 1 year into the marriage. She complains alot to my husband and this creates stress for him. She treats me differently when my husband is around or not around. Treats herself as the queen of the house - the living room, kitchen and everything is arranged in the manner that suits her - so I stay in my room. She cooks but sometimes I wish she does not cause, some stuff are not edible at all like fish slice with potato soup. Her cooking, I don't really like and she likes to do it over the top and in huge quantities that we throw away lots cause no one can finish. And she leaves all the cookingware allover unwashed till weekend then maybe when I feel like it, I clean up after her. My husband and I are the maid cause she eats and drinks everywhere and leaves the cups and bowls for me to collect and wash. Everyone gives in and she's always right. The kids my MIL take care are my BIL kids. So I don't give a damn if she teach them the wrong things or does not discipline them. I just hope they grow up quickly and stay away from my place. my FIL is a quiet man. My MIL had commented that she is and will always be the one and only one to boss people around and she will be the one and only one to throw tempers.
I can accept everything but I find it hard that even as I try to give in, she is still unhappy that at times I reject doing things or didn't know she kept food for me and she will complain and make such a drama out of small thing as if the world is going to end. The worse part is my husband listens and he is after all her son, so he agrees and supports her. So there is no contest or conflict there. At times, I feel like moving out on my own. There are good and bad, but it depends on individual personality. My MIL and my character are direct opposite. I like peace and quiet and non-confrontational. She is loud and brash and over the top controlling with a strong aggressive shrew confrontational style. Its nothing wrong. Its just her. And its just me and we both rub each other wrong.
Poor thing, I understand how u feel.Originally posted by mistyblue:Yeah good and bad.
my MIL says things without thinking and creates a number of quarrel between us one of which my husband wanted a divorce and we are not even 1 year into the marriage. She complains alot to my husband and this creates stress for him. She treats me differently when my husband is around or not around. Treats herself as the queen of the house - the living room, kitchen and everything is arranged in the manner that suits her - so I stay in my room. She cooks but sometimes I wish she does not cause, some stuff are not edible at all like fish slice with potato soup. Her cooking, I don't really like and she likes to do it over the top and in huge quantities that we throw away lots cause no one can finish. And she leaves all the cookingware allover unwashed till weekend then maybe when I feel like it, I clean up after her. My husband and I are the maid cause she eats and drinks everywhere and leaves the cups and bowls for me to collect and wash. Everyone gives in and she's always right. The kids my MIL take care are my BIL kids. So I don't give a damn if she teach them the wrong things or does not discipline them. I just hope they grow up quickly and stay away from my place. my FIL is a quiet man. My MIL had commented that she is and will always be the one and only one to boss people around and she will be the one and only one to throw tempers.
I can accept everything but I find it hard that even as I try to give in, she is still unhappy that at times I reject doing things or didn't know she kept food for me and she will complain and make such a drama out of small thing as if the world is going to end. The worse part is my husband listens and he is after all her son, so he agrees and supports her. So there is no contest or conflict there. At times, I feel like moving out on my own. There are good and bad, but it depends on individual personality. My MIL and my character are direct opposite. I like peace and quiet and non-confrontational. She is loud and brash and over the top controlling with a strong aggressive shrew confrontational style. Its nothing wrong. Its just her. And its just me and we both rub each other wrong.
Sometimes the in-laws take for granted that we have to give in. When I try to avoid or is just doing my things like cleaning or whatever, my MIL comes over and makes comments such that i like cleaning so much therefore she is justified to leave everything for me to clean up. Or when I come home late, she makes comments that I have an affair outside and is enjoying myself. Then she also make comments that I never take care of my husband and always give him problem and make him come fetch me at work etc (I never asked my husband and he volunteers when he feels like it). My MIL also accuse me of trying to kill her with my cooking and now I don't cook and she is angry I never take up cooking to help her out. When I hide in my room, my MIL complains to my husband that I am unfriendly and I have to keep my doors open but anyways even with doors shut, she walks in on us and sometimes when we are in the middle of something. Either way, I am fuked.Originally posted by gerrykoh:Poor thing, I understand how u feel.
My FIL was a very difficult person to live with. Always criticising & lecturing. He also smokes in front of my kids. He is so fussy, wants things his way. He likes to collect magazines & cuttings- my house has 8 big boxes.
Sometimes when things gets too much, he said he doesn't want to live with me. I told him straight off- that none of my sisters-in-law can stand him. Also he will have to maintain his own household whereas he lives with me for free. Luckily he passed away & I did a major spring cleaning.
Dealing with difficult in-laws - one has to 'ren'- for the sake of my husband.
Most times I avoid by disappearing upstairs. If one is working, then better still cos less time spend together either that or move out if possible.
At least they are quiet. You don't want vocal ones who give uneducated opinions about you and your relationship with your spouse and seemingly try to drive you guys apart.Originally posted by tutu2:For my case , is abit unique,even though we stay in the same house, we dun speak >10sentence a day,they are introvert, ke qi type.
My pil condition are rare case ..
1) they nvr own a house in their entire life; used to live in Grandma's house (house under mil & grandma name),
2) they hv 2 sons, when the 2 sons got married, they were ''chased " out by grandma one of the DIL don;t want to let them stay with her
errr, boss, i think parents in law and grandmother like different right?Originally posted by popikachu:my grandmother used to stay with us...
no special thing happen mah...
just that got another person to nag at my untidy room...
haiz now she go back her old house le...
no one pei wo liao tian...
Wow, mistyblue...Originally posted by mistyblue:At least they are quiet. You don't want vocal ones who give uneducated opinions about you and your relationship with your spouse and seemingly try to drive you guys apart.
Mine also never own a house so that's why they had to stay with us because the other son don't like them. The other DIL also don't want them around her house. I am with the youngest son and he love his parents above and beyond anything. So I have to try to make-do. There are good things, there are bad things. When the bad comes, its a case by case basis.
For me, I am the outsider in the new house because out of 4 person, 3 of them are from the same family. So I will have the least say.
very different, he'll grow up & find out soonOriginally posted by LordIcarus:errr, boss, i think parents in law and grandmother like different right?
hi mistyblue,Originally posted by mistyblue:At least they are quiet. You don't want vocal ones who give uneducated opinions about you and your relationship with your spouse and seemingly try to drive you guys apart.
Mine also never own a house so that's why they had to stay with us because the other son don't like them. The other DIL also don't want them around her house. I am with the youngest son and he love his parents above and beyond anything. So I have to try to make-do. There are good things, there are bad things. When the bad comes, its a case by case basis.
For me, I am the outsider in the new house because out of 4 person, 3 of them are from the same family. So I will have the least say.
haiz... my grandmother is my parent's parent in law right?Originally posted by LordIcarus:errr, boss, i think parents in law and grandmother like different right?