http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 en-US 60 <p>The problem lies with you and I'm glad that you know.<br /> <br /> 1. You lacked of self-confidence which is very important.<br /> <br /> <strong>Please be more confident next time round, a girl won't be with you if she doesn't love you.</strong><br /> <br /> 2. In a r/s, TRUST is very important! By nagging at her on how unhappy you were seeing her blog with another guy name you're simply telling her that. I don't trust you and that guy.<br /> <br /> <strong>Everyone needs their own circle of friends, you won't want her to do the same to you right? By asking you not to make friend with any girls.</strong><br /> <br /> 3. Gifts need not to be expensive.<br /> <br /> <strong>You can design your own card and get it print, the most it would only cost $2-$3 or bake your own cookies and put it in a lovely box with some sweets or something, she'll be touched to death! The thing you made is priceless and unique, some girls will appreciate it. Frankly speaking how much can a few stalks of roses cost? Not as if your anniversary falls on Valentine's Day.</strong><br /> <br /> Now the point is will you be able to change for her? If you can, just do your best to try patch things up and make things worked! Good luck and all the best to you.<br /></p> Mon, 16 Jul 2007 18:09:32 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6847068 ALW http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">something really bad happened to us ytd..<br /> <br /> i thought through.. and decided to leave her to find her own happiness..dont wanna hurt her anymore.. so i sent a good bye msg..<br /> <br /> moments later.. i went to her blog.. the blog title was "her and the guy's name fairyland thingy" first look, i got angry..<br /> <br /> i thought he was the reason why we broke up.. and shes with him now.. so i called her up.. knowing that hours ago she just hang up my phone telling me not to talk about the past.. called her for like 10+ times before she answer.. and she didn't even know about the blog title..she told me its her friends change de.. and yes few of her friends got her acc..i dono why she give them.. she say they want to play mah..so she let them lor..sigh.. and now they are invading her privacy..<br /> <br /> i misunderstood her.. and made her angry again.. she msg me ask me for peace.. i'm such a sucker.. when she needed me.. i added on to her problems..<br /> <br /> sigh.. i really want to be there for her now.. but shes just pissed with me.. ignoring me totally..</div> </blockquote> <p>Every action only shows that you are a guy without self control.<br /> YOu think that she wants you but in fact she hates you for doing such dumb things.<br /> <br /> If I am the girl I will break up with you for sure.</p> Fri, 13 Jul 2007 13:59:26 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6829841 zeny http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>still going ? <img title="Rolling Eyes" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_rolleyes.gif" alt= "Rolling Eyes" /><br /> <br /> Anyways i have to say this..<br /> <br /> You are a sucker all right...<br /> <br /> From first post till now is like a graph going up... then down.. then up... then down...<br /> <br /> Reaching the top only to be b|tch slapped down back to ground zero n dangling the carrot for u to climb the mountain again.... n b|tch slap your @ss back down again.</p> Fri, 13 Jul 2007 12:28:48 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6829339 BadzMaro http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>something really bad happened to us ytd..<br /> <br /> i thought through.. and decided to leave her to find her own happiness..dont wanna hurt her anymore.. so i sent a good bye msg..<br /> <br /> moments later.. i went to her blog.. the blog title was "her and the guy's name fairyland thingy" first look, i got angry..<br /> <br /> i thought he was the reason why we broke up.. and shes with him now.. so i called her up.. knowing that hours ago she just hang up my phone telling me not to talk about the past.. called her for like 10+ times before she answer.. and she didn't even know about the blog title..she told me its her friends change de.. and yes few of her friends got her acc..i dono why she give them.. she say they want to play mah..so she let them lor..sigh.. and now they are invading her privacy..<br /> <br /> i misunderstood her.. and made her angry again.. she msg me ask me for peace.. i'm such a sucker.. when she needed me.. i added on to her problems..<br /> <br /> sigh.. i really want to be there for her now.. but shes just pissed with me.. ignoring me totally..</p> Fri, 13 Jul 2007 12:17:58 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6829289 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>hai.. <img title="Neutral" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_neutral.gif" alt="Neutral" /></p> Fri, 13 Jul 2007 11:09:30 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6828838 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">i do..<br /> <br /> i sent her a msg..saying good bye. and don't wish to hurt her anymore..<br /> <br /> with all my nonsense that irritates her..<br /> <br /> i have no idea what might happen..<br /> <br /> maybe its gone le..</div> </blockquote> <p>Send her gd nite message... sweet sweet de...<br /> <br /> wont be gone so easily de lar...<br /> <br /> If gone liao, can have back de mar &gt;.&lt;</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 22:09:01 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824817 popikachu http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>i do..<br /> <br /> i sent her a msg..saying good bye. and don't wish to hurt her anymore..<br /> <br /> with all my nonsense that irritates her..<br /> <br /> i have no idea what might happen..<br /> <br /> maybe its gone le..</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:39:22 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824672 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>well TS, you know what to do now after so many replies from us?<br /> <br /> Hope you do!<br /> <br /> One thing to becareful also, Don't do any other SINGLE thing that will hurt her again...<br /> <br /> I believe she still love you...</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:35:44 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824648 popikachu http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>understood.. haha.. you know.. sometimes.. you know what is right to do.. just that.. you don’t want to do it.. like giving up.. but its time..</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:35:15 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824644 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>The other forumers have already given u fairly sound advices.<br /> <br /> But I wish to add something important ...<br /> <br /> <img title="Arrow" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_arrow.gif" alt="Arrow" /> When you have to "say" something about who you are as a man, how interesting you are, or how much a person should feel attracted to you with WORDS, it automatically creates doubt... because if it was true, then you wouldn't need to SAY it.<br /> <br /> <span style="color: red;"><strong>It would be OBVIOUS.</strong></span><br /> <br /> In other words, the best way to communicate all of the most IMPORTANT things is through your actions.<br /> <br /> What most guys try to do is convince a woman to feel attraction by telling her all kinds of things about themselves , and it usually BACKFIRES.<br /> <br /> Women can smell the "I'm actually insecure" in you.<br /> <br /> Please keep that in mind.<br /> <br /> Always.</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 21:27:00 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824601 royale9 http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>got you.. thanks =))</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 20:54:27 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824364 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">i finally understood what kind of hell she went through when she was with me..<br /> <br /> she loved me dearly..<br /> i doubt her badly..<br /> <br /> guys.. hurting her is my greatest regret.. i dont wanna lose her..<br /> <br /> tell me how can i get another chance from her?? <img title= "Crying or Very sad" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt="Crying or Very sad" /></div> </blockquote> <p>The answer to that question, ironically, is by not begging her for another chance.<br /> <br /> You may think that your groveling is only "sharing your feelings", which is what women supposedly like, but on an emotional level she sees begging as just wimpy.<br /> <br /> Don't beg/ fawn/ pester her.<br /> Your way doesn't work because it's based on emotions, brainwashing, false hopes and wishful thinking.<br /> <br /> The ball is on her court now.<br /> <br /> Search your soul bro - its time for a reality check.</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 20:53:28 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6824356 royale9 http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>i finally understood what kind of hell she went through when she was with me..<br /> <br /> she loved me dearly..<br /> i doubt her badly..<br /> <br /> guys.. hurting her is my greatest regret.. i dont wanna lose her..<br /> <br /> tell me how can i get another chance from her?? <img title= "Crying or Very sad" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt="Crying or Very sad" /></p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 19:11:37 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6823829 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">got your point..i'm trying my best already..</div> </blockquote> <p>Talk to her more and communicate with her more. Learn to be more conscious and aware of what is going on in your life and be more conscious of her moods, feeling and thoughts.<br /> <br /> Read more.</p> Thu, 12 Jul 2007 05:19:12 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6821499 AndrewPKYap http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>got your point..i’m trying my best already..</p> Wed, 11 Jul 2007 23:37:05 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6820474 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">i guess i really hurt her alot..<br /> <br /> she told me over the phone just now..that everytime she talks about me with her friend she'll feel sad..<br /> <br /> sighh..i really don't wanna hurt her anymore..but at the same time don't wish to lose her too..<br /> <br /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /></div> </blockquote> <p>Think of a solution to not hurt her, while not losing her...<br /> <br /> another way of saying may be, just make her feel comfortable with you...<br /> <br /> well...</p> Wed, 11 Jul 2007 22:50:30 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6820185 popikachu http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>i guess i really hurt her alot..<br /> <br /> she told me over the phone just now..that everytime she talks about me with her friend she'll feel sad..<br /> <br /> sighh..i really don't wanna hurt her anymore..but at the same time don't wish to lose her too..<br /> <br /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /> <img title="Crying or Very sad" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_cry.gif" alt= "Crying or Very sad" /></p> Wed, 11 Jul 2007 22:46:59 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6820159 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>thanks alot.. i read all of it.. i admit that im indeed a very impatient guy.. and always spoil things myself due to that..<br /> <br /> will learn from it..seriously..<br /> <br /> thanks for the advice <img title="Smile" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_smile.gif" alt="Smile" /> <img title="Smile" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_smile.gif" alt="Smile" /></p> Tue, 10 Jul 2007 23:29:27 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6814599 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>I guess still like her a lot.<br /> You wanted her back right?<br /> <br /> What i feel is that, there is still a chance to recover this relationship.<br /> Just that, it would take some time.<br /> <br /> Your First Game with her is over...<br /> Now you will need to start everything again...<br /> <br /> Stop pestering her with the 'Could you give me another chance?' question... That's irritating. Really. It is irritating because she don't have the answer to give you yet. As you said, she is a person who need time.<br /> <br /> 'So when to ask her again?'<br /> When the time is right...<br /> 'When will the time be right?' is now the problem...<br /> <br /> The reason she broke off with you is what her don't like about in this relation.<br /> Firstly, you have to chance this thing first.<br /> For your case, it's your nonsense. Stop all the stupid nonsense. Hope you already learn how to stop those nonsense after the lesson.<br /> <br /> After, you have to go back everything from the start again. What i feel is that, she still have the feeling for you.<br /> <br /> She maybe very confuse now... Thinking whether should you be given this chance, or to forget about the relationship. She say she will consider it, she mean it.<br /> <br /> "anyways..she told me she had been thinking about what i said..to give me another chance..but when i asked again this morning..it was the same, 'don't waste your time le' ..."<br /> <br /> This part here is that you irritate her make make her have no other answer to reply you. Stop irritating her or she will really force to mean 'don't waste your time le'<br /> <br /> She is feeling awkward now... She don't know how to face you... She will try to avoid you... That will be normal...<br /> <br /> What you can do now til the time to ask her again is to make her awkwardness toward you disappear...<br /> <br /> Make her feel comfortable with you again... Make her happy... Stop your nonsenses...<br /> <br /> You can try to get your relationship better now by treating her like a totally new friend and try to get close to her again...<br /> <br /> She didn't block you on msn is a good thing and still can answer your call is also another good thing... Bring the friendship closer... Stop reminding her about your stupid nonsense...<br /> <br /> Maybe you can still go out together go gai gai... if cannot one on one then in group with other friend, show her concern (don't overdo it or it become another irritating thing...)...<br /> <br /> Hope this will help you.<br /> Btw, from what you wrote, i really feel that she still have the feeling for you...<br /> Don't give up pal!<br /> Also, don't regret whatever path you choose.<br /> Choose your path wisely!<br /> <br /> <img title="Wink" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_wink.gif" alt="Wink" /></p> Mon, 09 Jul 2007 20:59:06 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6807876 popikachu http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">but problems started. i wasn't able to take her blog having more of other boys than me. nearly every post has another guy's name. but i know she didn't love him..he was just a friend. but i was just jealous.<br /> and this became one of the biggest problem..</div> </blockquote> <p>updates during the weekends..<br /> <br /> i found out that that guy she always mention likes her..and is chasing her..cause his female friend who is also from the same class as both of them has been making fun of them. she sent comments to him over friendster those glittering pictures showing a heart with both their names.. but the thing is, my love can't view those pictures..and she didnt know..i called her and asked..she was shocked and said she wont be with him even if he confess..he is just a normal friend to her..and admitted that i was right all along saying that guy was interested in her..<br /> <br /> to me..its like the guy just acts like shes already his stead..letting ppl know that they seemed to be together..his friendster acc..only has pictures of idols and 1 picture of her..and there was a comment left by my love to him..asking, why is the pic there?? put pics of yourself pls..something like that..<br /> <br /> anyways..she told me she had been thinking about what i said..to give me another chance..but when i asked again this morning..it was the same, 'don't waste your time le' ...<br /> <br /> thanks for reading</p> Mon, 09 Jul 2007 10:27:39 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6805197 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>noted all of your points.. thanks for all the advices and comments, and i'm 17 this year <img title="Confused" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_confused.gif" alt="Confused" /> <img title="Confused" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_confused.gif" alt="Confused" /></p> Sat, 07 Jul 2007 13:40:17 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6796784 d0ug http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>maybe you are just not ready for a relationship, after all, i think you are under 21 years old<br /> <br /> this is just your side of the story and until it is possible to know the other party side of the story, which i don't think it is possible, then we can come to the conclusion</p> Sat, 07 Jul 2007 09:00:28 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6796072 allentyb http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <p>Hmmm.<br /> <br /> All i can say is she needs a break. But the fact she took so long to come to that decision shows that she is really keen into it. So i guess not much of a hope left, try not to hang onto that hope but instead learnt from wad u have done wrong and dont repeat it again. Thats the most impt thing. She may or may not accept u back eventually but move on.</p> Sat, 07 Jul 2007 06:43:39 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6795924 seotiblizzard http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">thanks for reading or clicking on this thread in advance =))<br /> <br /> this story is about me and this girl..<br /> <br /> that night, i asked her if she could call me and talk on the phone for the first time. she replied, 'must i call?'. i was rather disappointed. and said, 'it's your wish'. moments later, i received her call. and my life started to change.<br /> <br /> i was having a meaningless life 'flirting' with girls before we started talking on the phone. i thought my life couldn't be any better, with almost every night on the phone, with different girls. then it was her, who changed me unknowingly.<br /> <br /> below is the story..<br /> <br /> i found this girl, by the name, B. she was hurt when i first met her..she wasn't able to forget the guy she liked for 4 years..though they were never together..and after listening to bits and pieces of her story, i decided to be there for her, until she is happy again. minor changes start to happen, without noticing, she became the girl i talk to almost every night, and replaced all my other acquaintances.<br /> <br /> things got closer between us, she couldn't sleep without my smses at 2am each day, she felt something missing without my call every night, and was able to give up her time talking to other friends of her's. i didn't tell her this before, but i was touched, and fell in love with her.<br /> <br /> few months later, after our poly life started, during the first week, we sms each other like crazy everyday. i remember just 1 bus trip to my school, we could msg up till 20times each. yes i had in mind the cost of the bill, but it was a happy moment for both of us. soon, we met each other up after school.<br /> <br /> the magical week, i asked to meet her at xx shopping centre after school. she told me she was gonna pick up something from there for her sis, and i offered to accompany her. i didn't tell her this too, many times, that night, and the 2 following nights we met, i wanted to hold her hand. but i know i'm not allowed to. i asked her out again on the same week, friday. this time we went vivo, met up my brother and his gf. many people went between us when walking, how i wished i could hold her hand and walk together. she never knew..<br /> <br /> i know i left her a good moment that night. and she asked me out the following week, offering to treat me dinner for my birthday. i was afraid at first, cause no girls asked me out before. i had no idea how to react, and gave her a feeling that i don't wanna go, but it's not true, i just don't know how to face her. she asked me if i was free on monday, and said she wanted to treat me dinner. i was wondering if i should go, and she told me something, that i will never forget in my life. 'if you're not free on monday, we shall go on tuesday. if you're still not free, i'll wait for you to be free.". something like this..the words are rephrase cause i couldn't remember word by word. so, we met. nothing much did happen that night at vivo. but soon after, i met her on the same week and we went vivo again. but this time, we spent most of the time at the balcony facing sentosa. i decided to make this the day, and tried hinting her on the bus to vivo, and at the balcony. if only she can remember, i put my hand on her lap, hinting her to hold mine. she didn't compromise, i thought that she didn't feel the same as i did. i remember this period, i lied down on the ground, and started looking at the stars. i was rather tired and thinking if i should really hold her hand today. and at that very moment, her hand came over to me and pulled me up. and i knew, i must hold it now.<br /> <br /> but something bad happened straight after. we were holding each other's hands tightly even when we are sitting on the bus. i felt that she didn't wanna let me go, so was i. but i told her something, that i wasn't ready. i was such a failure since primary school days. never succeeded before each time i chased a girl. i wasn't ready cause all these years, i've never been accepted. was really relieved that she wasn't angry.<br /> <br /> and that's how we got together.<br /> <br /> at the start, we met around 3 times per week, having a good time each outing. and we went ahead to kissing few days after we got together. our love was strong then..<br /> <br /> but problems started. i wasn't able to take her blog having more of other boys than me. nearly every post has another guy's name. but i know she didn't love him..he was just a friend. but i was just jealous.<br /> and this became one of the biggest problem.. i regretted for nagging about this problem time and time again which made her feel sick and tired of it..the outcome is always argument between us.<br /> <br /> now that i think of it, i should have given her more time..the fact that she said she will change her blog and stuff for me when we are stable..<br /> <br /> soon, our 1 month anniversary came. i was so so sooooooo excited over the weekends. was asking my friends what their bf do for them during their anniversary. some tell me to buy her flowers. but ... i was having financial difficulties at that time.. and i lied to her, saying that i didn't have the time. felt really really sorry..i'm such a useless boy. can't even buy FEW STALKS of roses for her during our first anniversary..she even paid for our movie..<br /> <br /> more problems came in between us after that.. mainly cause i still didn't stop my nonsense.. and made her sick and tired of the arguments..i don't blame her for that..but i'm really really hurt that even after i changed, she didn't give me the love i've always wanted..she didn't stop showing disinterest with me..she didn't show me love at all..but she used to love me more than i did..<br /> <br /> that day in school, i heard, we can leave at 10am but there is a course for us at 4 to 5.30pm..i was fighting inside my mind..whether i should send her home after school..and i made up my mind to after that. gave her a call..and asked that question..i didn't know that she will actually scream at me and insisted on going home herself..she didn't used to show me this kind of treatments..i believe its my nonsense that changed her..<br /> <br /> recently, i left her alone to think through, what i have done for her and what she gave me in return.. but turns out that she had been thinking whether we should still be together..i feel like a moron digging my own grave..<br /> <br /> she took quite a long time to make up her mind to end our relationship..<br /> <br /> guys..my question is, how can i get another chance from her? i need advices if possible..i feel that shes a girl who needs alot of time..need advices .. i don't wish to lose her..<br /> <br /> thanks for reading =)</div> </blockquote> <p>Looking at your story reminds me of my old days when I first date my first gf.<br /> Done what you have done and end up losing the gal. Sadly I notice all first time bf makes the very same mistake as you did,<br /> <br /> Your gf still did not ban you from msn and you still have a last bit of hope left. Mine first gf dump me, change pager, change address ( move to her grandma's house just to siam me."<br /> <br /> Work on your money, when a guy is in any relationship he has to pay for 2 person instead of one. So cash flow is very impt, try to use this time to earn more money.</p> Sat, 07 Jul 2007 03:42:44 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6795771 zeny http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065 <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">thanks for reading or clicking on this thread in advance =))<br /> <br /> this story is about me and this girl..<br /> <br /> that night, i asked her if she could call me and talk on the phone for the first time. she replied, 'must i call?'. i was rather disappointed. and said, 'it's your wish'. moments later, i received her call. and my life started to change. (edited: too long)<br /> <br /> i know i left her a good moment that night. and she asked me out the following week, offering to treat me dinner for my birthday. i was afraid at first, cause no girls asked me out before. i had no idea how to react, and gave her a feeling that i don't wanna go, but it's not true, i just don't know how to face her. she asked me if i was free on monday, and said she wanted to treat me dinner. i was wondering if i should go, and she told me something, that i will never forget in my life. 'if you're not free on monday, we shall go on tuesday. if you're still not free, i'll wait for you to be free.". something like this..the words are rephrase cause i couldn't remember word by word. so, we met. nothing much did happen that night at vivo. but soon after, i met her on the same week and we went vivo again. but this time, we spent most of the time at the balcony facing sentosa. i decided to make this the day, and tried hinting her on the bus to vivo, and at the balcony. if only she can remember, i put my hand on her lap, hinting her to hold mine. she didn't compromise, i thought that she didn't feel the same as i did. i remember this period, i lied down on the ground, and started looking at the stars. i was rather tired and thinking if i should really hold her hand today. and at that very moment, her hand came over to me and pulled me up. and i knew, i must hold it now.<br /> <br /> but something bad happened straight after. we were holding each other's hands tightly even when we are sitting on the bus. i felt that she didn't wanna let me go, so was i. but i told her something, that i wasn't ready. i was such a failure since primary school days. never succeeded before each time i chased a girl. i wasn't ready cause all these years, i've never been accepted. was really relieved that she wasn't angry.<br /> <br /> and that's how we got together.<br /> <br /> at the start, we met around 3 times per week, having a good time each outing. and we went ahead to kissing few days after we got together. our love was strong then..<br /> <br /> but problems started. i wasn't able to take her blog having more of other boys than me. nearly every post has another guy's name. but i know she didn't love him..he was just a friend. but i was just jealous.<br /> and this became one of the biggest problem.. i regretted for nagging about this problem time and time again which made her feel sick and tired of it..the outcome is always argument between us.<br /> <br /> now that i think of it, i should have given her more time..the fact that she said she will change her blog and stuff for me when we are stable..<br /> <br /> soon, our 1 month anniversary came. i was so so sooooooo excited over the weekends. was asking my friends what their bf do for them during their anniversary. some tell me to buy her flowers. but ... i was having financial difficulties at that time.. and i lied to her, saying that i didn't have the time. felt really really sorry..i'm such a useless boy. can't even buy FEW STALKS of roses for her during our first anniversary..she even paid for our movie..<br /> <br /> more problems came in between us after that.. mainly cause i still didn't stop my nonsense.. and made her sick and tired of the arguments..i don't blame her for that..but i'm really really hurt that even after i changed, she didn't give me the love i've always wanted..she didn't stop showing disinterest with me..she didn't show me love at all..but she used to love me more than i did..<br /> <br /> that day in school, i heard, we can leave at 10am but there is a course for us at 4 to 5.30pm..i was fighting inside my mind..whether i should send her home after school..and i made up my mind to after that. gave her a call..and asked that question..i didn't know that she will actually scream at me and insisted on going home herself..she didn't used to show me this kind of treatments..i believe its my nonsense that changed her..<br /> <br /> recently, i left her alone to think through, what i have done for her and what she gave me in return.. but turns out that she had been thinking whether we should still be together..i feel like a moron digging my own grave..<br /> <br /> she took quite a long time to make up her mind to end our relationship..<br /> <br /> guys..my question is, how can i get another chance from her? i need advices if possible..i feel that shes a girl who needs alot of time..need advices .. i don't wish to lose her..<br /> <br /> thanks for reading =)</div> </blockquote> <p><img title="Arrow" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_arrow.gif" alt="Arrow" /> All your negativity contributed subconsciously to your self fulfilling prophesies - your failure in this relationship is a mirror image of your basis definition of love. I shall quote you the phrases that have attached maliciously as part of your core belief:<br /> <br /></p> <blockquote> <div class="quote_from">Originally posted by d0ug:</div> <div class="quote_body">'...i was afraid at first, cause no girls asked me out before. i had no idea how to react, and gave her a feeling that i don't wanna go, but it's not true, i just don't know how to face her.<br /> <br /> ...but i told her something, that i wasn't ready. i was such a failure since primary school days. never succeeded before each time i chased a girl. i wasn't ready cause all these years, i've never been accepted.'</div> </blockquote> <p><img title="Arrow" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_arrow.gif" alt="Arrow" /> The source of your possessiveness was created from your perpetual effort of trashing yourself down in negative light. If you reckon that you are unlovable, no matter how glorious your relationship has the potential to be, it will appear bleak; like peering through a pair of sunglass, even if the landscape could steal your breath away with its majestic stunning colours and lush details.<br /> <br /> From the way I look at this, your psychological and emotional structure appears more problematic than your relationship itself. If you are unable to exhibit love for yourself and raise that self esteem, your next relationship would just be the next prey to be devoured by this insecurity once again.<br /> <br /> Paradoxically, though you understand that 'you are digging your own grave', you still persisted with your nonsense - signified a terribly lack of wisdom.<br /> <br /> I hope you understand that the downfall of this relationship is largely because you are not emotionally and spiritually evolved - strong hint of an alpha male dominance. Resolve that inner afflictions caused by your developing years and enlighten those blemishes from within. <img title="Idea" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_idea.gif" alt="Idea" /><br /> <br /></p> <blockquote> <p><strong>..but i'm really really hurt that even after i changed, she didn't give me the love i've always wanted..she didn't stop showing disinterest with me..she didn't show me love at all..but she used to love me more than i did..</strong></p> </blockquote> <p><img title="Arrow" src= "/images/emoticons/classic/icon_arrow.gif" alt="Arrow" /> I will repeat again: this is a self fulfilling prophesy. You reckoned that you will always fail in relationship and so congrats: <span style= "text-decoration: underline;"><strong>you achieved exactly what your mind has envisioned.</strong></span> Never mind how great the relationship was and never mind about she giving more previously - because you thought that you are unlovable and doesn't deserve genuine love, therefore you coerced subconsciously her to comply likewise.<br /> <br /> Individually, your condition is far from what Love needs of you personally before you are ready for a relationship. It's not about love - it's about you. If you can't even handle yourself, I doubt you are in any position to extend this very love to someone else. <img title="Idea" src="/images/emoticons/classic/icon_idea.gif" alt="Idea" /><br /> <br /> Cheers</p> Sat, 07 Jul 2007 01:29:35 +0800 sgforums.com:12:266065:6795447 Yunhaier http://sgforums.com/forums/12/topics/266065