Just feel the need to let this out..
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My first post. Have always been reading around the forums..
Well just feel the need to let this out..
Been with this guy for 1 year 5 months.. He liked me before I like him.. After asking four times, I finally accepted him.. He was everything I could want at that time.. We had the same interests, we can talk about anything.. Basically we were on the same frequency..
About three months into the relationship, I moved in with him. Because, while staying with my parents, they didn't really let me go out late.. But since he finished work pretty late at about 11pm most times, I'm forced to make a choice.. So I guess that pushed me to move in with him.. Previously I stayed in hall in uni..
Most of my time were spend with him since we live together.. He used to manage a tuition centre near the place where we live, so I'll always be in the office with him while he taught.. as time goes by, because he needed tutors and the financial situation wasn't very good.. I took up tuition classes for him.. The money I earned will go into paying for the car loan, for our room rental, office rental and so on.. Of course he's paying too..
Things were supposedly well.. We spent all our times together, working hard, going out sometimes. But as the financial situation got worse, he became busier and although we were together most of the time, it was me studying or teaching and him doing his teaching as well.. It wasn't what I would call 'quality time' I guess. But at that time, I thought that if I love him, all these were just nothing much..
In around july/august this year, we were pretty close with this other couple.. And the four of us decided to go into a new line of business.. Things got started.. In September however, I was pissed with him for an incident and I kinda showed my 'black face' to the other guy (one of the partners). He was telling my ex how angry he was that I showed him my bad mood even if he wasn't the one that I was angry with..
It was a huge incident that my ex and I argued a lot about.. I felt that although it was my fault for not being sensitive enough, my only argument was that I thought that guy was like a close friend so I don't really have to hide my feelings that much.. I was just keeping quiet that day and not like I was throwing my temper on the other guy.. The other guy's argument was that if I could do this to him, I could do this to clients next time and it would be bad..
My ex wanted me to apologise to that guy, but I thought it was a small matter and I didn't see my mistake at that time so I refused.. My ex didn't explained why I was wrong as well..
So I was cut out of the new business.. And mostly because of this incident, my ex suddenly told me he wanted to break up.. I guess because he felt that I could no longer help him in the new business, and money was important to him at this point in time.. Before he broke up with me, he already moved to another girl which was a friend introduced by that guy..
I guess I can't let it go.. because he was so perfect before this incident.. Because I've put in so much emotions, effort into this relationship.. We were planning to get married next year.. So much plans, goals.. The future.. It's just gone like that.. It's hard to accept that a guy who could love you so much could just suddenly do this cruel thing to you..
Because all my times have been spent with him, so the empty voids now are quite unbearable and lots of memories in lots of places.. -
love is blind , don worry, at least u know hes not the type of loyal ppl..
Maybe to you this is bad luck, but sometimes its an oppurtunity in disguise.. dont u feel glad u and him already broke up and u know how he really think.. rite?
cheer up la..we all had our lesson.. find another love..
any prob can PM me -
Your ex really money-minded!
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well.. he said that he hope i understand that at his age, he cannot afford to dilly dally any longer.. he's tired of being poor or just able to make it.. he really wants to make this work.. and this new biz will allow him to do that..
money really change people.. -
So who hasn't had a broken heart before....?
Move on ba.....
The way I look at your description of circumstances, you shud be happy it's all come to an end - it's more of a release!
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade!
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no la.. your ex is realy retarded one.. to him money is everything.. yes la.. money is important but somehow u cant ignore your gf what.. i wud rather die than ignoring my gf .. no matter how busy also i have to plan some time with gf also..Originally posted by tinuviel07:well.. he said that he hope i understand that at his age, he cannot afford to dilly dally any longer.. he's tired of being poor or just able to make it.. he really wants to make this work.. and this new biz will allow him to do that..
money really change people..
too bad, not you dont understand your ex.. your ex is just too selfish.. and think your unimportant...
selfish ppl always have excuse for what they do -
be thankful this happened before ur married.....no matter how much u have invested in the R/S, its OVER......dun look back anymore coz he isn't.
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true, learn from this masterOriginally posted by de_middle:be thankful this happened before ur married.....no matter how much u have invested in the R/S, its OVER......dun look back anymore coz he isn't.
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is this some PUBLICITY stuntOriginally posted by Zarks:no la.. your ex is realy retarded one.. to him money is everything.. yes la.. money is important but somehow u cant ignore your gf what.. i wud rather die than ignoring my gf .. no matter how busy also i have to plan some time with gf also..
too bad, not you dont understand your ex.. your ex is just too selfish.. and think your unimportant...
selfish ppl always have excuse for what they do
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Originally posted by de_middle:is this some PUBLICITY stunt
its the truth !.. my principle ! -
ok ok, its good that u have such a principle.....if only all guys can do the sameOriginally posted by Zarks: its the truth !.. my principle !
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why thank u, unfortunately i still have alot to learnOriginally posted by Zarks:true, learn from this master 
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Whether you want to or you can or not, it does not make a difference... think about that.Originally posted by tinuviel07:I guess I can't let it go.. because he was so perfect before this incident.. Because I've put in so much emotions, effort into this relationship.. We were planning to get married next year.. So much plans, goals.. The future.. It's just gone like that.. It's hard to accept that a guy who could love you so much could just suddenly do this cruel thing to you..
Because all my times have been spent with him, so the empty voids now are quite unbearable and lots of memories in lots of places..
Secondly, do not work together. Relationships are known as romantic relationships because it is supposed to be "romantic" and that is, unreal, pleasant illusionary and delusional.
When you work at the same place, even worse you go into business together, it will cause a lot of friction because you cannot be romantic and "business minded" at the same time. At work and business, you do not have the luxury of "romance".
You can be hard and business minded with colleagues and business partners, in fact you should be. You are "hard" when you are at work and you become soft when you are with the one you love... it has to be like this. -
yup if only all guys couldOriginally posted by de_middle:ok ok, its good that u have such a principle.....if only all guys can do the same but relationship has different importance to different people.. -
hmmmOriginally posted by AndrewPKYap:Whether you want to or you can or not, it does not make a difference... think about that.
Secondly, do not work together. Relationships are known as romantic relationships because it is supposed to be "romantic" and that is, unreal, pleasant illusionary and delusional.
When you work at the same place, even worse you go into business together, it will cause a lot of friction because you cannot be romantic and "business minded" at the same time. At work and business, you do not have the luxury of "romance".
You can be hard and business minded with colleagues and business partners, in fact you should be. You are "hard" when you are at work and you become soft when you are with the one you love... it has to be like this.
what if the couple is starting a family business?
What's your opinion -
Couples working together is a big no no....
Especially opening up a new business... -
i tiellll you la.. you should be happy cuz you are not his wife ,dear..Originally posted by tinuviel07:yup if only all guys could but relationship has different importance to different people..
He love you so much ? i doubt lor... he love his money more... -
Don't. You want your business to prosper, you have to be rational, hard headed and uncompromising when you cannot compromise (of course you have to compromise in the sense that you have to take into account the fact that people are not perfect).Originally posted by eagle:hmmm
what if the couple is starting a family business?
What's your opinion
Yet if people are in the wrong you have to be brutal with them and point out their errors and your unhappiness with their performance.
You cannot do that with your spouse. If you do that, it will affect your "romantic" relationship. In a romantic relationship, you are expected to pamper each other, gloss over each other's faults and be positive when everyone else has given up on you.
With parents and siblings, it might still work out because relatives, unlike spouses, do not expect you to be romantic.
You need to face reality and that is, people need romantic relationships. Once the two of you are in business together or working closely together, romance will suffer and the relationship will suffer (it might survive) and your quality of life (for both) suffers.
I am not talking about survival here although there is a high chance that the relationship cannot survive. I am talking about the quality of the relationship. -
Round 1~
Fight !! *Ding ding ding* -
at least be glad u have not married him with kids. That will be the worst scenario.
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yea until that stage., i think TS wont post anything in sgforum already, she will immediately kill that guy heheOriginally posted by sLeEpWaLkErInG:at least be glad u have not married him with kids. That will be the worst scenario. -
yeah.. i see him for what he has done.. but in this period, there will always be times when i'm deluded when thinking about the past...
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i dun think u r that old after studies, tidy up your emotions and who knows you will meet someone better and dun let this episode to pre-judge the next guy who comes along.. be fair to him.
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it will be ok soon de la.. the memory is still there , i know.. but once thigs is not urs.. just remeber the sweet memory enough.. but have to know its over..Originally posted by tinuviel07:yeah.. i see him for what he has done.. but in this period, there will always be times when i'm deluded when thinking about the past...
Pat Pat TS -
thanksOriginally posted by Zarks:it will be ok soon de la.. the memory is still there , i know.. but once thigs is not urs.. just remeber the sweet memory enough.. but have to know its over..
Pat Pat TS i think it has to do with the age gap too.. haha i'm 21.. he's 31.. altho he doesn't behave like his age..