Is it normal? From the 2 year on...he never say "I love you". Never sweet talk. We acted like strangers at home. Only talked or asked question necessarily. Is he tired of me? I don't think that he is having an affair.

He said that we have passed that stage so no need to say "I love you" anymore. I don't feel love anymore. I have to tell myself everyday that he loves me so as to keep me going on staying by his side and not to give myself any chance to stray.

honey i love u like i have never loved someone so much.

Originally posted by newcomer:

honey i love u like i have never loved someone so much.

huh??? Dun like that leh...I'm really very stress already.

Don't worry, mona lisa.

some men just nvr expresses his feelings verbally but it doesn't mean that he doesn't love you, you know.

But if you want to confirm, seduce him up, just like the way how you both first wooed each other. If he doesn't react with affection, then I guess he may be tired of you. Let's hope not.

We never have good nite / good morning kisses and we only kiss during sex. What is this??? Feeling like a free pros.

never say doesn’t mean doesn’t lub u

Originally posted by mona_lisa:

Is it normal? From the 2 year on...he never say "I love you". Never sweet talk. We acted like strangers at home. Only talked or asked question necessarily. Is he tired of me? I don't think that he is having an affair.

He said that we have passed that stage so no need to say "I love you" anymore. I don't feel love anymore. I have to tell myself everyday that he loves me so as to keep me going on staying by his side and not to give myself any chance to stray.

We married for 19 yrs & he also never said that to me
He only called me mummy when he's talking to my dotter
Never call me 'lao po' also when my dotter 3 guys' friends have call her 'lao po' when she was not even in any r/s with them *so sad*
But I can't b bother by all this trivial matter *still living happily*

that means he takes you for granted!

either that or you are not so close already...maybe

A lot of men are like that. They do not like to say such things after getting married. They didn't think it's a problem cos they thought that the wife will understand.

Try talking to him and telling him how you feel. Things can only work out if both of you communicate with each other and understand each other better.

i got this feeling that if they say “i love u” to u now, u will suspect ur husband got affair outside.

Originally posted by mona_lisa:

We never have good nite / good morning kisses and we only kiss during sex. What is this??? Feeling like a free pros.

"I love you" can be communicated in a myriad of ways, not just verbal.....
Actions speak louder than words ok? Particularly so for married couples. Verbally communicating it becomes cliched and indeed, meaningless, when it is being said in hundreds of ways everyday!

Hmm ya.. i think actions really make a lot of difference..

can u think of small actions which says that he thinks about you? Lke on his way home from work.. perhaps he might buy something for u to eat?

Sometimes we need to look for 'more than words' to know whether someone love u or not.

methinks it’s sad… actions are all well and good but… it’s nice to say it… if they mean it for the person saying it as well as the person hearing…

Originally posted by Jezmeister:

methinks it's sad... actions are all well and good but... it's nice to say it... if they mean it for the person saying it as well as the person hearing...

treat ur wife nice nice ok

" Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have. "

Men tend to show love through a different way after marriage, sometimes u just need to talk to him about it, let him know it. And he might just change for you.

Good luck.

Originally posted by RatedR:

treat ur wife nice nice ok

I was intending to in my eyes love is the only reason to marry anyway... but lets stick to the topic lol

Originally posted by mona_lisa:

We never have good nite / good morning kisses and we only kiss during sex. What is this??? Feeling like a free pros.

kiss him first!

action speaks louder than words la.

coz he don't like monalisa

Originally posted by aluvguru:

A lot of men are like that. They do not like to say such things after getting married. They didn't think it's a problem cos they thought that the wife will understand.

Try talking to him and telling him how you feel. Things can only work out if both of you communicate with each other and understand each other better.

I don't agree that man are like that after they are married - what I don't agree exactly is the rationale behind the behaviour; that it's because of marriage per se that sparked this dry & monotonous attitude towards Love.

The reason why men hardly express themselves is because this codex is not found naturally in their system. Unless they acquire it in their system to do so naturally; to say 'I Love You' is in fact going against the current. It seemed so unmasculine to say something like these.

What happen is that these men merely reiterate the way their father behave to their mum, in which all that subconsciously captured itself during the man's childhood development. Without exercising conscious wisdom to evolve, they will repeat the same style or mannerism into their marriage.

I think it's bullshit when I hear guys telling me that it's so 'not ok' to express love, often citing that love is never having to say.

I think it's saddening.

Something so natural, only to be suppressed by our psychological barrier to self expression.

Have you people ever met a certain kind of death... a sudden death that claim a life overnight and you have absolutely no more chance to express your affection?

Tombstone perhaps? Crying your guts out and regret the hell out of your life?

I have seen something like that. It's tragic. So fucking tragic.

Cheers

Originally posted by Yunhaier:

The reason why men hardly express themselves is because this codex is not found naturally in their system. Unless they acquire it in their system to do so naturally; to say 'I Love You' is in fact going against the current. It seemed so unmasculine to say something like these.

I disagree, I don't think I ever heard my dad say it to my mum but I happily say it all the time to my fiancée, in public if that's where we are, and same with a lot of other guys I know, and a lot of them are 'big, hard metalheads' - if they love their gf they're more than happy to say it at least in private and show it wherever, even two of my best mates who both are completely people you'd not expect to be soppy always kiss goodbye etc in public.
I'm not saying it's not possible to love without saying or showing it so much I just think that what you're saying is a massive stereotype and perhaps isn't quite really the case, at least not anymore.

Originally posted by Jezmeister:

I disagree, I don't think I ever heard my dad say it to my mum but I happily say it all the time to my fiancée, in public if that's where we are, and same with a lot of other guys I know, and a lot of them are 'big, hard metalheads' - if they love their gf they're more than happy to say it at least in private and show it wherever, even two of my best mates who both are completely people you'd not expect to be soppy always kiss goodbye etc in public.
I'm not saying it's not possible to love without saying or showing it so much I just think that what you're saying is a massive stereotype and perhaps isn't quite really the case, at least not anymore.

My dear, that's because you learn it to acquire it in your system somehow and not deny your innate self expression. I din say that it's absolute that parental influence will overrule, but this psychological pattern is very apparent. Albeit it’s likely, but individual evolution have the last say in all things in life.

To be expressive is an acquired thing - I don't see it as something impossible. Like I say, it's a codex - anyone can learn to download the 'software' into their system, if they have the wisdom to uncover it.

I am glad for you.

Cheers

i dont feel that love needs to be stated verbally to make it a true expression of affection. If a person's actions speaks of love, it can speak it louder and with more depth than words.

For e.g. my parents does not ever say that they love me. But each time they see me after a long time apart, my dad will hug me and my mom will look very happy. A friend of mine, her dad would go and cook for her and clean up house when she has a baby - all without asking for thanks - and that's our relationship with our parents knowing they love without words.

My husband don't often say the words "I love you". But what he does for me, I can see it with more clarity than in other relationships I had been in, where the words "I love you" had been said. it is in a the small considerations - the fruits he would slice after dinner, putting toothpaste on my toothbrush in the morning. .. the way he looks at me when I being my usual crazy self... etc.

I don't think it was because there was no love in other relationships, but that while one can FEEL love, and SPEAK of love - to show LOVE is actually something that you need to learn and practice in our daily mundane lives, and not some 'melodrama' sacrifice.

And it was this which he taught me in our marriage as I struggled to learn how to be less selfish, less individualistic in my considerations, so that I can learn to 'show' that i love him, rather than take the easy way out by simply saying it.

It isn't easy and I am still learning from my better half.

Originally posted by mona_lisa:

Is it normal? From the 2 year on...he never say "I love you". Never sweet talk. We acted like strangers at home. Only talked or asked question necessarily. Is he tired of me? I don't think that he is having an affair.

He said that we have passed that stage so no need to say "I love you" anymore. I don't feel love anymore. I have to tell myself everyday that he loves me so as to keep me going on staying by his side and not to give myself any chance to stray.

guys are like that, get used to it

guys are practical, if there is no immediate reason to say something, we dont say it.