[ URGENT ] Serious Ex issues
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I have been reading this reputable and useful aunt agony forum and wanted some advices on what I should do right now. This is my problem.
My ex is still in the same class as me.
Everyday without fail, she'll filrt with almost every guy in the class, whether its on studies, jokes or anything. This irritates and affected me immensely on my emotional status. Even though we are no longer together, the sight of her smiling with other guys triggers a strong volume of jealousy deep within.
The worst thing is, I don't know how to get rid of this jealousy problem, even though I know we can no longer be together. I even tried to walk out of the classroom during lunch hours just to avoid seeing her with those guys, but to no avail.
This caused me to become moody every now and then. I have also tried every possible ways to extinguish my feelings for her eg. thinking of other girls, studying real hard, sleeping etc. I am really at loss of what to do.
So fellow SGforumers, please advise me on what can I do to avoid sinking into depression and dropping in my grades. Your help will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
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well it seems like your ex is playing around just to agonise and upset you.
allowing yourself to be affected by her actions will only cause her happiness over your grief.
concentrate on your studies, pick up a hobby, join a cca, mix around with your schoolmates.
show her that you can survive w/o her exisitence.
only when you attain true happiness, will she get the misery she deserves.
let your motto be "DIE BIATCH DIE!!!"
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It's hard to get rid of jealousy, especially when she's your ex. there are 2 options u can pursue
A) Start socializing with everyone in your class, crack jokes with them or whatever. Dis will get your confidence back on track and reduce depression. Furthermore, humans are after all, social animals. Socializing is a good way to get stress and depression off one's back. How to make a headway in socializing ? well , just let go some ego and smile more!
Well when i for one forget about my troubles when i socialize with my friends and teachers. They are at the receiving end of your worries and would always ( most of the time ) give u a friendly advice. Sure, it might sound silly as it may not apply to everyone, but the essence of it is to think positive. Good luck
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Don't be affected by her flirty actions. It's either she's trying to spite you by flirting with other guys or that's already her natural behaviour.
Often, we humans always add more problems to weigh down themselves. Since it's already over between the both of you, why let it bother you so much?
Jealousy is the root of the problem. If you felt jealous over the way she's seeking attention with guys, then find something to distract yourself away eg. chat with your close friends and spending some time on your favourite hobbies.
Tell yourself you can do well with or without her existence. You can find a better girl than her in the future.
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Do you still have feelings for her ?
You get jealous because you see she is moving on, while you feel being left behind. This feeling is worst if you are the one who called it quits.
Nobody likes to be left behind, so purple-yellow... pull yourself together and get your life moving again.
The old ones don't go, new ones won't come.
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Since u two are no longer together
just let her have her freedom bah..
i know its freaking upset to see her flirting with other guys..
but...
wad to do..?
occupy urself with other things bah..
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Is she doing it to spite you? You'd be a fool if you fall for her jealousy trap. Do not, I repeat, do not let her actions dictate your mood.
Think professional. School is for schooling. Nothing else.
Seems like you have limited social contact. Understand that your world do not revolve around your ex. If you wanna find
, there's still a great big world out there. Why let yourself be confine to a 
that has thorns?Once you have graduated, and both of you ended up in separate schools, that jealousy feeling should subside. Out of sight, out of mind.
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wat caused the break up?
who initiated?
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Originally posted by purple-yellow:
I have been reading this reputable and useful aunt agony forum and wanted some advices on what I should do right now. This is my problem.
My ex is still in the same class as me.
Everyday without fail, she'll filrt with almost every guy in the class, whether its on studies, jokes or anything. This irritates and affected me immensely on my emotional status. Even though we are no longer together, the sight of her smiling with other guys triggers a strong volume of jealousy deep within.
The worst thing is, I don't know how to get rid of this jealousy problem, even though I know we can no longer be together. I even tried to walk out of the classroom during lunch hours just to avoid seeing her with those guys, but to no avail.
This caused me to become moody every now and then. I have also tried every possible ways to extinguish my feelings for her eg. thinking of other girls, studying real hard, sleeping etc. I am really at loss of what to do.
So fellow SGforumers, please advise me on what can I do to avoid sinking into depression and dropping in my grades. Your help will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Option 1:
It's either you go to consult your teachers for some simple conselling or go to the professional helplines (that comes with a price).
Option 2:
Else you jolly well go find another gf soon to prove that she's not worthy of you.
Simple as that.
The more suffering that is shown on your face, she will definitely be happier.
If you want to put an end to it. Than get to the core of the problem.
Option 3:
Identify why in the first place you both broke up.
WRITE OUT all the reasons why she's not worthy of it.
and Tell yourself you deserve better girls.
ADDing behind that telling yourself you need not feel anything about her actions since she doesn't cherish her own body nor her reputation.
Repeat those reasons to yourself everyday in the morning and night.
It might work.
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Thanks to all the useful comments and advices! I will heed all of your advices. Hope all these will work.
Yes, my social contact is indeed limited. But I do have friends whom I can share my sorrows with, that is enough for me as I am easily pleased.
It was her who initiated the break up.
The reasons are bullshit to me, they are excuses rather than reasons or causes.
Thanks again to all!
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Do the same to other girls la...
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Give it up...
She won't go back to you...
Forget about her... -
Originally posted by purple-yellow:
I have been reading this reputable and useful aunt agony forum and wanted some advices on what I should do right now. This is my problem.
My ex is still in the same class as me.
Everyday without fail, she'll filrt with almost every guy in the class, whether its on studies, jokes or anything. This irritates and affected me immensely on my emotional status. Even though we are no longer together, the sight of her smiling with other guys triggers a strong volume of jealousy deep within.
The worst thing is, I don't know how to get rid of this jealousy problem, even though I know we can no longer be together. I even tried to walk out of the classroom during lunch hours just to avoid seeing her with those guys, but to no avail.
This caused me to become moody every now and then. I have also tried every possible ways to extinguish my feelings for her eg. thinking of other girls, studying real hard, sleeping etc. I am really at loss of what to do.
So fellow SGforumers, please advise me on what can I do to avoid sinking into depression and dropping in my grades. Your help will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Easy,break off lo forget her concentrate on your hobbies and interest. go out with friends,have fun!!! girl only what one gone many many good one waiting one you also
Cheer up friend!!!
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ä¸�è¦�ä¸ºäº†ä¸€æ£µæ ‘............. sigh.
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Simple solution really.. open yourself up to other girls.. get together with some buddies...
Why revolve your life around her ?
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Originally posted by ^tamago^:
ä¸�è¦�ä¸ºäº†ä¸€æ£µæ ‘….......... sigh.
放弃整个森林
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Maybe you just have face it - there is a flaw in your character - and it is the reason of your relationship failure - jealous and too prosessive.. !!!
Man if you feel this way to your ex !!! imagine how you behave if she was your gf .... poor girl !!!
Stop being so abusive !!! -
relax la.. gal only.
go find smth else to do. let her flirt la.. in the end, it's an "ex"
old liao..
dont think so much.. at least you tried but never work. that's why "ex"
anyway, last time she like that or after break up then change or always been like that?
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she might change her mind if you own a Mercedes
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well, today, sort of chatted with her again. i know im a retard, doing this kind of thing. but, couldnt control myself.
wanted to be at least frens with her. close frens even.
but after i stated to her that, she replied no, sorry.
asked her what was it that was holding her back, she couldnt explain.
wanted to ask millions of questions, wanted to know the very truth. but couldnt have the courage to even type it out to her.
she flared up the next moment, using caps and all. making it clear it was impossible for us to have anything else anymore.
i stated that i wasnt trying to have any relationships wif her anymore. and she said she wasnt implying i was.
those words, they strucked me like a satanic blade, deep down my heart. and the feeling of being slapped again and again was back.
words that were flowing around in my mind, couldnt muster up the courage to type them out. whereas i could, to others, instantly.
i am like an object of resentment to her, an object she despised, greatly. an object she never wants to see again.
she went offline after that. without looking at what i have to say about all this.
now, i feel like a loser and a shameless bastard, keep on sticking to her. i kept on trying to chat with her and all, holding onto any hope available. kept trying to infer from her words, looking for a hidden meaning to every one of them; like a stray dog rampaging through a rubbish dump. knowing that there isnt any food no matter how hard he try.
im in deep shit, i really am. i will be seeing her again on monday for class.
how am i going to face her? how is she going to treat me? what will i react upon meeting her?
thousands of question, none answered.
what should i do? i have tried all those that you kind souls have given me, but all failed upon meeting her online just now.
i really suck, im at wits end now. i can do nothing, totally nothing to stop this kind of feeling for her. this special place in my heart, specially for her....
forumers, kind forumers, please advise me what i should do now. thanks...
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Purple_yellow,
There is nothing else we can advise you, other than to try your best to let it go.
The girl don't want you, you cannot force a relationship.
Keep making yourself a pest, soon the whole school will know what a loser you are.
If you really cannot let it go, best thing is to consider a transfer to another school.
This is the reason why people say not to shit where you eat. Same will apply to your adult working life. A hard lesson to learn.
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Originally posted by purple-yellow:
well, today, sort of chatted with her again. i know im a retard, doing this kind of thing. but, couldnt control myself.
wanted to be at least frens with her. close frens even.
but after i stated to her that, she replied no, sorry.
asked her what was it that was holding her back, she couldnt explain.
wanted to ask millions of questions, wanted to know the very truth. but couldnt have the courage to even type it out to her.
she flared up the next moment, using caps and all. making it clear it was impossible for us to have anything else anymore.
i stated that i wasnt trying to have any relationships wif her anymore. and she said she wasnt implying i was.
those words, they strucked me like a satanic blade, deep down my heart. and the feeling of being slapped again and again was back.
words that were flowing around in my mind, couldnt muster up the courage to type them out. whereas i could, to others, instantly.
i am like an object of resentment to her, an object she despised, greatly. an object she never wants to see again.
she went offline after that. without looking at what i have to say about all this.
now, i feel like a loser and a shameless bastard, keep on sticking to her. i kept on trying to chat with her and all, holding onto any hope available. kept trying to infer from her words, looking for a hidden meaning to every one of them; like a stray dog rampaging through a rubbish dump. knowing that there isnt any food no matter how hard he try.
im in deep shit, i really am. i will be seeing her again on monday for class.
how am i going to face her? how is she going to treat me? what will i react upon meeting her?
thousands of question, none answered.
what should i do? i have tried all those that you kind souls have given me, but all failed upon meeting her online just now.
i really suck, im at wits end now. i can do nothing, totally nothing to stop this kind of feeling for her. this special place in my heart, specially for her....
forumers, kind forumers, please advise me what i should do now. thanks...
Your refusal to accept your situation creates the misery you have inevitable
put yourself into.So what if you are going to see her on Monday?
So what if there are thousands of questions?
Actually, you already have an answer (a blatant one in fact), just that it isn't the answer you seek, although it is an answer that answers all your questions.
You don't need advice - you merely need decision.
If you keep harboring the possibility and desire of a relationship (BGR or non-BGR related), you are just going to bang yourself against the wall.
Learn to respect - if she hates your presence in her life, then exercise the wisdom to walk out of her space and find the life and love that's truly yours.
Cheers
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å¦‚æžœä½ çœŸçš„çˆ±å¥¹ï¼Œé»˜é»˜çš„ç¥�ç¦�她也好, 希望她好好的生活。
ä½ ä¹Ÿè¦�开始的好好生活.
Let time does all the healing.
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Originally posted by purple-yellow:
I have been reading this reputable and useful aunt agony forum and wanted some advices on what I should do right now. This is my problem.
My ex is still in the same class as me.
Everyday without fail, she'll filrt with almost every guy in the class, whether its on studies, jokes or anything. This irritates and affected me immensely on my emotional status. Even though we are no longer together, the sight of her smiling with other guys triggers a strong volume of jealousy deep within.
The worst thing is, I don't know how to get rid of this jealousy problem, even though I know we can no longer be together. I even tried to walk out of the classroom during lunch hours just to avoid seeing her with those guys, but to no avail.
This caused me to become moody every now and then. I have also tried every possible ways to extinguish my feelings for her eg. thinking of other girls, studying real hard, sleeping etc. I am really at loss of what to do.
So fellow SGforumers, please advise me on what can I do to avoid sinking into depression and dropping in my grades. Your help will be greatly appreciated. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
To battle jealousy, try to evoke happiness feeling for her and you are actually feeling glad that somebody who you care for alot is now well and happy. It is much better, alternative feeling than harbouring jealousy.You can't have her. You don't own her- So your feeling of jealousy is not rational thingy.Learn to respect her boundaries. When a girl says no firmly means that she really means NO.
You can don't avoid her in the class in the future. I don't think avoiding in the class will help all the time. Despite whatever has happened, life goes on, try to live your life happily now.
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Seriously, that drama about satanic blades cutting deep down into your heart belongs to Hollywood.
You on the other hand belong to the real world so wake up and smell the roses.
I think the only way to save you is to tell you as it is.
It is about time you start thinking and behaving like a man instead of a child.
A man will not hurt himself by giving women who are not attracted to him a piece of his time and affection.
A man realizes that his greatest seduction tool is his happiness and pride as a man.
A man realizes that a life doing fuck all but trying to get into a woman’s good book is a worthless one.
She may not give you enough company.
She may not give you enough affection.
But she must always give you enough respect.
Women will not stay with men they don’t respect.
She is treating you like a child because you are behaving like one.
All that whining and pleading and refusal to accept that you have lost.
You need to stop.
Never give in out of fear that you will lose something.