wa lao...

nowadays...life is so....deviant for me...

smoking, drinking, wasting money away which i had saved few months ago...

going clubs...going out late at night...

gf left me 2 months ago, now i still feel so emo....every afternoon 5pm den wake up... nite time 4am den sleep. feel so emo and restless... usually we get to do things together, now im alone, she is out with her frens...im alone...

frens all busy working work work whole day work only....then maybe i too emo...they keep saying i very sad...and stuff...den nv call me out...probably cuz i dampen the mood...den i feel...wa lao they r here, but i don wan their prescence only...den i feel so lonely...the only people left who are free are those who ....im not close with..

family doesnt understand how i feel after the break up. the only words are 'dont smoke' and 'its ok, everything is fine'. i feel so pressurized they have to scold me for going out late....not sleeping...after all ,im so stressed, juz let me be, why muz insist here n there?

dont trust me also..think i going take drugs or what...keep checking on me...i feel like i have no freedom.

and my ex...she likes to....give me those sacarstic tone and laugh at me...when im real sad and know its my mistake, she juz hates me and continue to make remarks about me. how bad i m and how good other guys are..

due to smoking, i keep coughing and my lungs are not in tip top condition.

my....wealth is gone. fined 200 dollars, have no money as savings, spent all...

i feel like i m wasted...even play game also can lose........ now everything is against me....wa lao...juz a rant..... so many pieces fell on the floor, asking me to pick them up...see so many i scared already.....sigh..

Change ur thinking? The more negative u think, the more downslope u are heading.

It's 2 months already. Time to wake up and move on.

changing my mindset not easy...if so easy we all ...live happily...like people say, it lies in the mind......if so easy...our minds would be refreshed..im trying...but i cant seem to...

THE LONELINESS PHASE: Feeling as if no one understands or cares.

SOLUTION: Surround yourself with people who do care, and who openly say so. Remind yourself often that you are loved.

THE DEPRESSION PHASE: Feeling sad, worthless, and foolish. You may have trouble eating and sleeping, and you may imagine that you'll never find anyone to love again.

SOLUTION: Allow yourself to feel your pain, but do not wallow in self-pity. Keep busy with exercise or projects.

Reference: http://www.cyber00.com/go.php/dumping/60/

Originally posted by sEphIrOth:

changing my mindset not easy...if so easy we all ...live happily...like people say, it lies in the mind......if so easy...our minds would be refreshed..im trying...but i cant seem to...

These are my few dimes. I'm not sure if it will help.

When one is depressed, one tend to see the world as bleak. It becomes an unrealistic view. Though the media love to report on negative stuffs like war, murder etc but we musn't forget that there are also tremendous kindness in this world... that didn't make it into the newspaper.

You can try this method.Contemplate on the kind acts people have done for you. There are things that you most probably have taken for granted. For instance, Your parent's concern for you. 

Another example is that we depends on the toil and sweat of the farmers who plant the rice. Now, it is by kindness of others that we have food to eat. It is by kindness and generousity of your parents that you have everythings that you have. you can see, you can talk, you can think, you can attend a university education.

Rejoice and be grateful for all the things that you have had.Rejoicing is an excellent antidote for depression. Rather than thinking about how awful the world seems, we make our mind happy by thinking of all the positive qualities that we and others have and all the beneficial actions we and others have done.

And for the break up, it takes time to get over it. Be patience and kind with yourself.

Haiz....Bro, we are all in the same boat. We all felt the same for you.

What ever is it, it is just a test. It is a test of character, thus dun give up so easily.

My wife left me with my kid in tow.....what worse can that be....I had only myself to blame. No one else can take the rap but me. I am not trying to say that my prob is gravier than yours, but I just want to tell you that there are people facing the same problem as you. For your info, my wife had left me for a year.

Similar to ur ex, my wife spoke to me with a cold tone, laid with much sarcasm on it at all times. I cannot argue the fact that i am very frustrated about this, but there is nothing i can do to change it. What is done is done.

Well, we all learn from our mistakes and hopefully to progress forward in the future. Sometimes, we still make the same mistakes, thats human nature. But what is important is that we must learn and push on, trying to minimize the same mistakes. 

{(Woman)}

At times, i do not understand how can a woman possess so much power to change a man's mind. Well, as you had experience, she had drag you down much to the pit of malice. Learn, and understand why she left you. Feel, knowing this feeling allows you not to repeat the mistake you make.

Straight to the point, all i can say, chin up soldier, there got to be someone out there for you. Someone who can understand you, Someone who can bring your trust into her heart and someone who can be there when you need her most.

{(Friends)}

I just had a big argument with a couple of my best friends over some very trivial matters. Haiz, once again, i overlook the pettiness in this situation, thus blowing a small matter into millions of debris. Now they are ignoring me.......Hiaz, what am i goin to do? TS, i feel sad but i am telling myself, there got to be a way to handle the delicate matter. As for you, look around you. What have you done to deserve so little respect from your friends??

Not wanting to bore you, allow me to end this reply by repeating myself again, Dun give up searching for hope, there got to be hope some where out there. It may take days, weeks, months or even years to find the one you love. It may take a big man's heart to say sorry to a person, but it pays big.

Kudo's to you for admitting your problem, least i know that after reading all the replies from the kind public to your topic, i got the slight tingling feeling that you are ready and prepared to rebuild the very foundations to your life again.

Feel free to PM me if you feel like. I will be gadly to help you if i can..... 

ermmmmmm ....... don't you have a job ? ...

thanks for all your insightful comments and experiences.

but i feel i let go of a gem...a real gem..

i had never been heartbroken cuz of a girl before, she was a gem, and i feel the pain in losing her.

change a new life... forget abt her but learn from ur mistakes... go clean urself up so u wun lose anymore face... ur gf must b having the time of her life seeing how f-up u become...

just think like this

"it could have been worse"

and also think positive

u are doomed….......but there is still time to come to the good side

Crying over someone who left is nt gng to do much good.

somebody livin la vida loca~! so how does it feel ?

wanna spend n drink , smoke n do drugs at least do it happy. Or fuking wasted la...  its like paying for prime steak and u go n eat the salad only like that... u just fuking urself up.

these is still not to the extreme. At least, these has not turned to a habit yet.

Originally posted by sEphIrOth:

wa lao...

 

nowadays...life is so....deviant for me...

 

 

smoking, drinking, wasting money away which i had saved few months ago...

 

going clubs...going out late at night...

 

 

gf left me 2 months ago, now i still feel so emo....every afternoon 5pm den wake up... nite time 4am den sleep. feel so emo and restless... usually we get to do things together, now im alone, she is out with her frens...im alone...

 

 

frens all busy working work work whole day work only....then maybe i too emo...they keep saying i very sad...and stuff...den nv call me out...probably cuz i dampen the mood...den i feel...wa lao they r here, but i don wan their prescence only...den i feel so lonely...the only people left who are free are those who ....im not close with..

 

family doesnt understand how i feel after the break up. the only words are 'dont smoke' and 'its ok, everything is fine'. i feel so pressurized they have to scold me for going out late....not sleeping...after all ,im so stressed, juz let me be, why muz insist here n there?

 

dont trust me also..think i going take drugs or what...keep checking on me...i feel like i have no freedom.

 

and my ex...she likes to....give me those sacarstic tone and laugh at me...when im real sad and know its my mistake, she juz hates me and continue to make remarks about me. how bad i m and how good other guys are..

 

due to smoking, i keep coughing and my lungs are not in tip top condition.

 

my....wealth is gone. fined 200 dollars, have no money as savings, spent all...

 

 

i feel like i m wasted...even play game also can lose........ now everything is against me....wa lao...juz a rant..... so many pieces fell on the floor, asking me to pick them up...see so many i scared already.....sigh..

hmm try don't smoke so much... try to quit slowly if possible. drink awhile is ok la... girlfriend no use wad girlfriend/boyfriend come and go like friend come and go you have to move on!

dun think too much la everything is fine ba... be positive abit exercise,sleep and watch tv enjoy life!

1girl gone many many queue up waiting for u la... haha enjoy!

quit smoking...though I've just gone back to smoking. LOL.

How long were you when you were with your gf?

if you are suffering from depression, then go see a doctor for anti-depressants

hmm not very long la...5 months but it seemed very close....not like those where we did not spend quality time...we did spend quality time, but we havent done everything, thats why i feel unfulfilled. she once said she is unfulfilled... but what to do?

she is once bitten twice shy.

summore...i dont dare approach girls...see ppl in club....here there got girls..i feel inferior...like what i done wrong....sometimes i m probably too hesitant too...

sigh but somehow the mistake i made was to make her my addiction and the cure is her...thats why its hard...how i wish i wouldnt rely so much on her in the 1st place.

i don't know whether mine situation is the reverse of yours but it's seemingly so.

i'm finding work to numb myself, fill myself with so engagements and writing essays for competitions and scholarships. looking out for money making and business opportunities.

it's as if my life revolves around material prospects and only that.

i feel... so disoriented.

If I'm your gf, I would be happy to have left you... *shake head*...

Not that your parents want to constantly check on you, they're concern about you... and you've not been doing anything to buck yourself up... your parents are worrying about you...

Buck up, boy!!!

change ur lifestyle

be more positive

1) get a job ( then u can get urself occupied with something to do)

2) call ur friend and make things right

3) if u cant get back with ur ex time to move on

hmmm i have a job but not everday. thats why days when im not working i feel the pinch.

my frens? what frens? all working, busy, go where nv call, maybe i become like this no one wants to be my fren...when im fine, everyone here, when i broke up, who was here for me?

when we broke up, everyone was there for her, but me? no one...

move on...but it ended quite abruptly, so i juz wish to see her one last moment...before i can set myself free, somehow it seems i cant....and it feels so hard.

Hi Sephiroth,

I'm wondering have you been cultivating friendship when you are in a relationship ?

Im going to ask u some questions, but instead of answering them now, see if you can find the answers within you.

1) Do you realise that you will have to let go of her at some point in life?

2) How much more time do you need before you will be ready to let go of it?

3) Will you become less when you let go of it?

4) Has who you are become diminished by the loss ?

no i have not cultivated any friendship.

she has...but her old frens...all back with her again. we sacrificed 905 of our time for ea other.

1.yes, but not so soon

2.when i see her for the last time...and know she is fine then n again. she had cut of ALL contacts with me including msn, frenster, sms

3.no, i will become much better. when i let go, i live my own original life

4.yes. very much wasted. i was a good person, not throwing tantrums, being fillial, never going out late.