feeling so demoralised. depressed about my breakup with my 6 yr relationship. dunno why my gf now ex must always leave me at crucial times. last time i accident and while recovering within the first 2 months(still recovering after 2 yrs..coz major accident) she broke up saying that i was boring. now i having my exams next week and she broke up again with me about 2 weeks ago. feel like shit really. cant study at all. no mood. wanna enjoy but also worried about my exams. dunno why but she always seem to be leaving me when i need her the most. i am unable to move on also because my heart feels so heavy. really v depressed and i am already mentally prepared to repeat my yr. :( why is it that she always leaves me when i need her the most? i just cant bring myself to accept her again if ever she comes back :(

she's training your mental strength

or it's just her way.. she probably does not treasure this relationship as much as you do...

u noe hor.. u shuld not indulge in ur pain and self-pity leh

behind every pain.. got a lesson to learn de.. dun take it so hard on urself.. and forgive them too.. learn gace and forgivingness thru it..

machiam game like tat.. u try to fight boss.. then u get owned... but u train and u level up liao.. u fight boss.. u own the boss... life and its lessons.. is also like that de..

because all girls are evil

If a girl tell u that u are a boring person and wanna break off with u.. Then fuk it.. Let her go. That's a very very lame reason. If she ever come back just tell her u are just not the man she wan.

"Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."

Why do you still wanna be in such a relationship?

Originally posted by couch^potato:

feeling so demoralised. depressed about my breakup with my 6 yr relationship. dunno why my gf now ex must always leave me at crucial times. last time i accident and while recovering within the first 2 months(still recovering after 2 yrs..coz major accident) she broke up saying that i was boring. now i having my exams next week and she broke up again with me about 2 weeks ago. feel like shit really. cant study at all. no mood. wanna enjoy but also worried about my exams. dunno why but she always seem to be leaving me when i need her the most. i am unable to move on also because my heart feels so heavy. really v depressed and i am already mentally prepared to repeat my yr. :( why is it that she always leaves me when i need her the most? i just cant bring myself to accept her again if ever she comes back :(

Before you begin dwelling in some incessant, bottomless pit of melancholy and depression, I think you need to have some deeper understanding of the misery you are into: there is quite a bit of narcissism, mourning why your ex-girlfriend always leave you in a lurch. However, when you reverse that self pity thought, I wondered why in the first place would you accept her again only to grant her access to create a second misery in your life one more time?

In love, we all have that bit of narcissistic self, craving for the certain attention, love and companionship from our other half. It is natural. However, I cannot stress enough on the fact that your individual happiness in any relationship cannot be entirely depended on another person. The mindset of 'I can only be happy in his/her presence' merely suggested that you are not only emotionally instable, but also lacking the innate self love you ought to brandish before you could start expanding this very love to another person and forge meaningful bond we called 'relationship'.

Perhaps you are also blinded by the fact that this is already a 6 years relationship and it feels painful to relinquish an investment you have so carefully nurtured. But technically speaking, it's even less than 6 years - considering the fact that every time you broke off, it starts from point zero and not where you last end off. This is this inflated your perceived misery and forms a 'Greater Lost Syndrome' in love (CloUdiSm).

Your sense of abandonment is reiterated, as you are unyielding to accept any possibilities in breaking-up or moving on. You merely create an avenue for your individual cosmic lesson to replay this excruciating karmic debt of helplessness and abandonment once again. You might clenched your fist and adamantly refuse to accept your outcome, but death in love is deaf and it hears no denial.

Once the lessons are provided spiritually, any attempt to lengthen it often promise prolong wretchedness.

Perhaps it's time for you to preview your situation and decide if it is worth the while to yearn for someone who doesn't really bother about you. In Love, we cannot always use the same yardstick to measure our relationship six years ago and now - for we have evolved emotionally and psychologically, thus our needs, expectation and personality will surely change over the years.

There are times when Love becomes irrelevant gradually - not because it did not exist in the first place, but rather, your spiritual journey with her has come to fruition and there is nothing else this relationship could provide for you.

Find someone who could walk through life with you, and not overly focus your effort on people who are bound to get down after a few bus stops. You can't stop them because that is their destination.

Cheers

Originally posted by Yunhaier:

 

Before you begin dwelling in some incessant, bottomless pit of melancholy and depression, I think you need to have some deeper understanding of the misery you are into: there is quite a bit of narcissism, mourning why your ex-girlfriend always leave you in a lurch. However, when you reverse that self pity thought, I wondered why in the first place would you accept her again only to grant her access to create a second misery in your life one more time?

In love, we all have that bit of narcissistic self, craving for the certain attention, love and companionship from our other half. It is natural. However, I cannot stress enough on the fact that your individual happiness in any relationship cannot be entirely depended on another person. The mindset of 'I can only be happy in his/her presence' merely suggested that you are not only emotionally instable, but also lacking the innate self love you ought to brandish before you could start expanding this very love to another person and forge meaningful bond we called 'relationship'.

Perhaps you are also blinded by the fact that this is already a 6 years relationship and it feels painful to relinquish an investment you have so carefully nurtured. But technically speaking, it's even less than 6 years - considering the fact that every time you broke off, it starts from point zero and not where you last end off. This is this inflated your perceived misery and forms a 'Greater Lost Syndrome' in love (CloUdiSm).

Your sense of abandonment is reiterated, as you are unyielding to accept any possibilities in breaking-up or moving on. You merely create an avenue for your individual cosmic lesson to replay this excruciating karmic debt of helplessness and abandonment once again. You might clenched your fist and adamantly refuse to accept your outcome, but death in love is deaf and it hears no denial.

Once the lessons are provided spiritually, any attempt to lengthen it often promise prolong wretchedness.

Perhaps it's time for you to preview your situation and decide if it is worth the while to yearn for someone who doesn't really bother about you. In Love, we cannot always use the same yardstick to measure our relationship six years ago and now - for we have evolved emotionally and psychologically, thus our needs, expectation and personality will surely change over the years.

There are times when Love becomes irrelevant gradually - not because it did not exist in the first place, but rather, your spiritual journey with her has come to fruition and there is nothing else this relationship could provide for you.

Find someone who could walk through life with you, and not overly focus your effort on people who are bound to get down after a few bus stops. You can't stop them because that is their destination.

Cheers

love reading your advices :)

maybe this is fated.

i can understand why you still accept her for the second time she came back,cause you love her.

but i think that's not the case for her.

loving someone is being there for them whenever they need you the most,in fact all the time.rather than leaving you in the lurch you see.

find another one will be better.

Simple. It isnt a bad thing u know. cuz u saw her true colour now. Conclusion, she never really loved u whether u liked it or not.

THe question is , will u still like this gal after u know its not true love? Hard to let go but u have to lor...just be in a quiet room, and mentally prepared to study for exam again. keep her things away from your sight in your room, perhaps u should pray for peacefulness before u start studying.

Dont worry, one day u will feel that u are reallly loved after u meet the one. Its not your time yet, now just study ya

Never trust girls .

yunhaier..thanks for the wonderful piece of advise u wrote. i too love reading your postings.

wahsehwahseh: yeah u are right. must level up always. i level up 3 times oledi till the extent that i am now more relax about it. but still depressed. err... get wat i am trying to say? haha

midlusionz: ya i am gonna do that and reject her IF she ever comes back again.

Xavier1979: yup shame on me.. i really feel the shame becoz everyone asks me why i do gte back together despite so many breakup n problems. haha.. so yup..shame on me.. and i do feel the shame. but no more shame anymore. i am and will change all this.

xaih: yup.. really damn sianz to know that this person leaves u in the lurch unconsiously every time when u are at the most bottomw of the pit. some ppl just dun realise their actions UNTIL they experience it themselves and my ex gf is like tat. that's why i had so many probs with her. always had to show her that she is doing wrong by doing that wrong to her myself. maybe in a way i was stupid n wrong too. haha..

zarks: yeah i console myself by telling that thankfully we are not married. i can now only TRY to study to the best of my current situational ability. anyway thanks for all ur advises.