Suspicion of Cheating
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I have a good friend and I suspect she is "cheating" with a married colleague at her office. I put "cheating" in quotation marks because it may not be sexual in nature.
Met up with her a few times and she mentions out of the blue that she has a "boyfriend" of a year or so, something which I was not aware of.
She also mentions in bits and pieces during our conversations that there is a guy boss in her office that has got this thing for her and that he will send her flowers with no card attached as a present for her birthdays. But she knows it's from him. The guy boss is married and has a young son. You know something is amiss when girls lament that guys are all the same, with their roving eyes and need to flirt from one girl to the next.
Why I suspect there might be more to it than meets the eye is that she occassionally tells me she needs to go back to the office over the weekends to work. And she apparently goes back quite often either on a saturday or sunday. Yes, to work. To meet up with him, I do not know.
I am her good friend and I do not wish to see her hurt in any way.
So what should I do?
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I don't see any reasons you should do anything since she does not even confide to you about the matter. If you feel obliged, you can advise her it is wrong to do so but you will most probably to be told myob...
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Originally posted by caleb_chiang:
I don't see any reasons you should do anything since she does not even confide to you about the matter. If you feel obliged, you can advise her it is wrong to do so but you will most probably to be told myob...
I suspect but am not sure.
I cannot go asking her directly if she is having some sort of tryst with her male boss.
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your friend is old enough to do what's good for herself.
if she's single and enjoys the attention, there's nothing you can do to stop the matters of the heart.
you can only be honest and tell her how you think. the rest let her decide..
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these are called ... "promotion farks" ? ...
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Originally posted by Fatum:
these are called ... "promotion farks" ? ...
She seems the ambitious sort though.
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Originally posted by charlize:
She seems the ambitious sort though.
read: she's probably screwing more than one ? ....
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Originally posted by charlize:
She seems the ambitious sort though.
there you have it.. ahhhaa..
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So nothing I can do to help?
A friend should just see her friend self destruct and do nothing about it?
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Mabbe can subtlely hint to her ba like leading a discussion into the topic. Don't confront her just discuss about the issue and both your opinions. U can guide her in the right way but you can't force her to go somewhere she does not want to.
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Originally posted by charlize:
So nothing I can do to help?
A friend should just see her friend self destruct and do nothing about it?
I already said.. all you can do is talk to her about it. the rest is up to her.
you don't have the right to chain her to her house right?
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Originally posted by charlize:
She seems the ambitious sort though.
if she is so ambitious and she knows getting close to superiors will only help her get close to her ambitions... why not!? it'll only propel her further.
at the end of the day, she'll get her promotion.
what you can do is drop hints reminding her he's already married, got family & stuff. -
Office affair are very common today. Cos people see each other more often than seeing their husbands or wives at home. Naturally as time goes, feelings rise and that's it.
So dun bother so much, you may loose a friend by venturing into her private life, let her take the medicine so that she will learn naturally.
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Originally posted by charlize:
So nothing I can do to help?
A friend should just see her friend self destruct and do nothing about it?
yes .... remind her about birth control ......
it'll be terrible if 闹出人命 ...
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Originally posted by Fatum:
yes .... remind her about birth control ......
it'll be terrible if 闹出人命 ...
birth control got no guarantee, better is to ask the male to go for insemination. -
Useless to give direct advice, give indirect advice.
Go concoct some story about affairs with married man, not only does it do harm to her, it also does harm to another innocent party.
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Originally posted by angel7030:
birth control got no guarantee, better is to ask the male to go for insemination.insemination ? ... wat talking you ? ...
people talk about chicken, you talk about dog ? ....
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Then again, it is not confirmed and I may be reading too much into it.
The male boss might be the one trying to get fresh (CB, family man with kid some more).
She might really be working.
I will chat more with her and drop indirrect hints and see what happens.
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Seriously, I hate men who use females like used tissues as a sort of rebound, and the worse thing is: the female thinks lowly of herself and is willing to be manipulated.
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Originally posted by charlize:
Then again, it is not confirmed and I may be reading too much into it.
The male boss might be the one trying to get fresh (CB, family man with kid some more).
She might really be working.
I will chat more with her and drop indirrect hints and see what happens.
she no bf 1? actuali theres nothing u can do... if she wans to continue wif the boss, the only person who can stop it is still her... if u wan jz ask her on her bf... n ask if its him anot... then jz do some talk wif her abt it... whether she wan to stop is up to her... -
Women are actually very fragile creatures.
Despite their ambitions.
Really.
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Originally posted by charlize:
Women are actually very fragile creatures.
Despite their ambitions.
Really.
U forget to put " " at the word FRAGILE.
Women are fragile by choice.
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I guess there is nothing much you can do....just be by her side
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Originally posted by RedizAlertz:
U forget to put " " at the word FRAGILE.
Women are fragile by choice.
CB, when I say fragile means fragile.
Oh, did I also mention that women are very gentle creatures too?