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Ah Beng Jokes (New)

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  • carpe diem jur's Avatar
    10,852 posts since Oct '04
    • ---- Ah Beng bought a new mobile.
      He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
      'My Mobile No. Has changed.
      Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'

      ====================================
      Ah Beng : I am a Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
      Friend: Really, what is he studying.
      Ah Beng: No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.

      ==========================================
      Ah Beng : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
      DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
      Ah Beng : Can I take tomorrow, tonight is final game.

      ===========================================
      Ah Beng : If I die, will u remarry?
      Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
      Ah Beng : No, I'll also stay with your sister.

      =========================================
      Ah Beng : People consider me as a 'GOD'
      Wife: How do you know??
      Ah Beng : When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
      Oh GOD! U have come again.

      ===========================================
      Ah Beng complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing,
      except the TV in my house.'
      Police: 'How the thief did not take TV?'
      Ah Beng : 'I was watching TV news...'

      =========================================
      Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'
      He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for complement.'

      =============================================
      How do you recognize Ah Beng in School?
      He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher
      erases
      the board.

      ===============================================
      Once Ah Beng was walking he had a glove on one hand and not on other.
      So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.
      ================! ==================================
      Ah Beng in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
      Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'

      ===================================================
      Ah Beng : Why are all these people running?
      Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
      Ah Beng - If only the winner will get the cup, why others running?

      ===================================================
      Teacher: 'I killed a person' convert this sentence into future tense
      Ah Beng : The future tense is 'u will go to jail'

      =====================================================
      Ah Beng told his servant: 'Go and water the plants!'
      Servant: 'It's already raining.'
      Ah Beng : 'So what? Take an umbrella and go.'

      =====================================================
      A man asked Ah Beng why Ahmad Badawi goes walking in the Evening and
      not
      in the morning Ah Beng replied Ahmad Badawi is PM not AM


  • meltz's Avatar
    19,884 posts since Sep '04
    • :lol: :lol: :lol:

      Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine' He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for complement.'

  • Moderator
    Je'taime
    fairlady_xoxo's Avatar
    10,775 posts since Jan '07
  • carpe diem jur's Avatar
    10,852 posts since Oct '04
    • Originally posted by meltz:

      :lol: :lol: :lol:

      Ah Beng comes back 2 his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine' He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for complement.'

      i like the last second one. hahar!

      Ah Beng told his servant: 'Go and water the plants!'
      Servant: 'It's already raining.'
      Ah Beng : 'So what? Take an umbrella and go.'

  • Gosu.'s Avatar
    494 posts since Jul '06
  • seotiblizzard's Avatar
    19,737 posts since Apr '06
  • sebosebo's Avatar
    532 posts since Mar '08
  • MohamedF's Avatar
    4,020 posts since May '06
    • Ah Beng england so nice meh... This is just an Ang Moh joke replace character with Ah Beng... icon_rolleyes.gif

  • Short Ninja's Avatar
    4,331 posts since Jan '07
    • Originally posted by sebosebo:

      not very funny compared to the jokes we make bout indians and malays leh.

      thats because Chinese people are very sensitive>LOL

  • 16/f/lonely's Avatar
    2,787 posts since Apr '08
  • sebosebo's Avatar
    532 posts since Mar '08
    • i mean we chinese have the meanest and most racist jokes for malays and indians leh, why not one of the joke make fun of the beng's small yellow dick?

  • I-like-flings(m)'s Avatar
    12,917 posts since Feb '04
    • i think the title is wrong lah.. why ah beng?? pls lah.. more like our MP answer to mi lor.....

      how to help the poor?? increase GST lor..

      how to have better government ??? pay them higher lor..

      same level of reply right?

       

  • Short Ninja's Avatar
    4,331 posts since Jan '07
    • Originally posted by sebosebo:

      i mean we chinese have the meanest and most racist jokes for malays and indians leh, why not one of the joke make fun of the beng's small yellow dick?

      Have you ever sang the song Bergawan Solo?

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