if your money could get you what you were asking, then why bother to come here to ask?

It's either you are a loser claiming to be a winner or you have an attitude problem that you refuse to accept.

Good luck on getting your hot chick anyway

play the piano.

In a small town, there lived two brothers. The older brother named Abel and his younger, Adan. Abel and Adan were fishermen. Abel had lost his sight during his early days working in a mine. For at least twenty years, he had finally saved up enough for the purchase of a tiny boardwalk, by the river. He was proud of himself, constantly telling his younger brother, about his miner days and his wonderful acquisition. "This is the best spot! The water is deep and the fishes are plenty!"Abel always saying to Adan. Life was simple. Each morning they would sit by the wooden planks, count their catch, satisfied with all they have. Usually a good day would fetch a basket full. At the end of the day, they would head to the marketplace where they sold for cash.

One fine morning, Adan and his brother set off to make their daily catch. As they were waiting patiently for their bite, Adan took notice of a new guy. The man, stout looking, was fishing over the opposite bank. Adan has never seen him around before. He saw that the man was busy bringing in his line, each time, full of fishes, tossing them into the baskets he brought. By mid day, he already had two baskets full. Adan and his brother had barely met their halfway mark!
As the Sun set, Adan patiently observed as the man leave with three baskets full of trouts when they ended the day with only two third a basket.

On their way back, Adan thought to himself. "The new fella looked novice. Surely he is not as skilful as him but how was he able to gather so many fishes on the same day? Moreover, Abel already had the best spot available!" He was confused and he began to have doubts about his brother's judgements and if that man, in fact, had occupied a better location.

So, the following day, Adan continued to observe the new guy as he returned to the same spot on the opposite bank of the river. True enough, he was again making catches after catches. He grew more excited each time the man brought his lines up. Adan eyes were fixed on him the entire day. And by the end of the day, they managed to leave with only a half a basket.

This strange phenomenon that Adan had thought was happening went on for a week. Adan had wanted very much to give himself a try and switch over to the opposite side to fish, but ended up disposing the idea as he felt doing so would sadden Abel. Abel needed him by his side, at his boardwalk.

It was the tenth day since the new man came along. As the brothers were packing their lines to leave, Abel said to Adan. "My younger brother. It puzzled me as much as it had puzzled you. Our catch is decreasing each day. This is not normal." Upon hearing this, Adan was glad yet hesistant to speak as Abel, had, broken the silence. Sensing that, Abel tells his younger brother,"You can leave if you wish to. I know you are worried about me. I can cope alone. I will be better alone."
Abel's words shocked him. He felt discomfort in his heart. He was disappointed that Abel had misunderstood his intentions."Brother, I do not want to leave you here. What would you do if I had left?"

Abel calmly said to Adan,"But you have to. If you don't, we will starve. This is a good season but we are bringing in fewer each time. Do you know why, my dear brother?" By this time Adan was about to reveal to his brother about the man he saw when Abel added,"It's been a long time since anyone had fished here apart from the both of us. You know, Adan, I can't convince you that we have and are in the best spot by the river, but I have lived to know that, with an uncertain heart you have, the same patience we no longer share, the fishes will not bite a distracted line as a bird will never build its nest on a wavering tree. So I say to you, it's better you leave than to stay on this ground and habour thoughts about the greener pasture over the other side. And as each time you do not receive the harvest you desire, you will be reminded. You will not feel justified."

Sometimes, departure or separation is essential for growth.

For those in love, if one day your partner choose to leave to seek better pasture, let them go. Only by doing that Love can grow. Holding back will only bring about dissatisfaction for both.

As the saying goes, "If you love her, you got to set her free. If she comes back, only then you know she's yours to keep"

God Bless

A: brown ball is placed on top of the red ball which blocked the brown's spot.

B: top cushion

C: bottom cushion

tell him both of you "道不同，不相为谋"

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You see. We give our tithes and offerings as a sacrifice to God and we have no control where the money goes to and how is it handled. When we've put our trust in God and fulfil our personal obligations why should we be concerned with the nitty gritty, about how the funds are managed, about how much salary the pastor is taking?

You are giving to know that your money is put into good use or are you giving as an obedience to God?

As a believer we, give willingly, having the faith that we are building God's kingdom and spread the gospel.

Yes I know there are lots and lots of people out there who are very concerned about whether the church is mishandling the funds its members give or not putting it into its best use.

But can i ask, who are you to judge, make baseless one sided assumptions just because one church pastor tend to be more prosperous than others?

Please know a church is a place of religious worship, not charitable organisation.

Please stop flaming for the sake of doing so.

Christianity is not a charity. Churches don't operate like charity

Tithes and offerings are given on one's own accord based on how he establishes his relationship with God.

The main purpose of churches is therefore, spread the gospel.

Matthew 28:19

Why question where the money goes to?

Pastor's takings, lifestyle, mishandling of funds? - Don't judge.

Originally posted by jojobeach:

So are you a Singaporean ?

Which school are you studying in ?

Jojobeach, you're in which profession?

The reason why you keep failing and getting rejected time and time again is due to the simple fact that you refused to find out what went wrong along the way.

There can be many reasons why girls reject guys for dates.

Yes. If you are born good looking, you do have an advantage.

But not every guy is blessed with good looks or born with a silver spoon.

There could be more guys born below average looking in the population then good looking ones.

So how? Don't need to date? Don't get married? Think again.

I have so many friends who fall into this category yet they are happily together with someone they love. Some even got married with kids.
The girls are good looking, mind you.

How is it possible?

It is because they have the right mentality. They know how to work their strengths and take responsibility in their life - how much they earn, how to have a good lifestyle, how to groom themselves up.

If you think you don't have the looks, groom up. There're no ugly people, just lazy ones.

If you think you're not rich, then work hard to earn it.

You're still young, learn from experiences. Always find out what went wrong when things don't go your way. Not finding convenient excuses and put the blame on others. How can you improve this way? You're just protecting your big ego.

And in the end, it's going to be a vicious cycle and you'll never get out of it.

Originally posted by wonderamazement:

They gave reasons like no looks no money... Can he be blamed for his looks?

Can the girls be blamed for their preference over the rich and beautiful?

Charity?

TS, aren't you the same?

Unless you're saying you want an poor and ugly girl as your girlfriend.

if not why are you lamenting over people's preference?

Why are you blaming women?

Most women choose financially stronger and better looking men because they are presented with a choice.

Why don't you blame those good looking and rich guys out there for attacting all the women?

You are weak.

Learn to take responsibility of yourself. Don't complain how unfair life is or how bad others treat you. Nobody owes you anything

The girls don't.

Love is a choice

similarly,

Improvement is a choice too

Stop whining and make yourself worthly.

TS, to be honest your topic header disgust me, even as a guy.

You are rather shallowly minded and you have got to change your perception.

In a war, will you go to the frontline and fight or would you stay behind and

hide?

In life, the greatest obstacles are not competition, not what people say what

you can't do but it's the very matter between your ears.

Fight the good fight and even at the face of defeat, you know you have

already emerged a winner.

Study hard. Don't let trivial matters get you distracted.

There's a time for everything.

Now's the time to focus on your studies and worry about nothing else.

If issues in BGR bothers you, then perhaps it's time to rethink about what's

best for your future and your priorities.

It's best you talk to her about it. A relationship without a vision have no

direction and at the end of the day, it won't last.

Afterall, both of you are too young.

whether it serves any purpose or not, I'm just curious. Yeah.

Yun’s a male or female? What’s his/her profession?

Haha. Give yourself a break and give us a break as well.

You loved yourself more.

That's good!

So let's mooove on

Girls like that are aplenty.They love to be desired. I'm surprised by how and to what extent some of them will go just to get that attention.

For you TS, seemed like you were just an in-between fit in for her while she waits for her new found interest to take her up.

She manipulated you to satisfy her own fantasies. Sounds crude ya?

Women love to be challenged.

Period.

The reason why you ended up in such a sorry state?

1. You found the wrong girl at the wrong time.

2. You fail to understand what kind of girl you're handling.

Next time, just play your own game, or be prepared to be gamed in theirs.

Cheers,

There's no point owning up. Telling her that the flowers were actually from you is not going to change anything. You have already made your stand clear to her. To her you're probably just a wuss. Pardon me for saying that, but this is what I felt.

Just forget about the whole issue whether she knows or doesn't know or whether you should let her know. She doesn't want to know anyway.

Step back and ask yourself what you really want out of this. Don't say that you're not expecting anything in return and you just want her to be happy. "Wanting her to be happy" is an expectation. And you probably thought keeping yourself by her side, helping her out, sending her presents is going to make her happy? Or are you just clinging on to some hope that one fine day she'll realise someone has been doing so much for her and start to appreciate him? Come on!

If you really like her, go and tell her. And accept whatever that outcome is because whatever it may be, it'll be the best for the both of you.

Just treat her the way how you would treat your girlfriend. Let her feel extremely comfortable together with you. Don't have to ask her to accept you again. Give her the feeling. Once she's happy with you. What else can you worry about? The problem with guys is we're too worried about where we stand and want affirmation most of the time.

TS, she's my gf now.

I mentioned that I was once in your shoes, facing somewhat similar situations. I had confessed to her too and she didn't reject or accept me. She just told me she wasn't sure as she felt that we do not really know each other well enough then. (We knew each other for 5 months) Sounds familiar to you?

Like you, I was really depressed and was actively looking for answers. I mean how terrible can one feel when you expressed interest to a girl and yet, you don't get a response and ended up with a riddle thrown back at you. At that point in time, I really tried to find out what she meant, by observing her actions and her behaviours whether she's comfortable with me when we're out together, thereafter. I found that things remained practically the same between us. There wasn't any feeling of awkwardness or easiness between us...

You did a good thing by confessing to her and making your feelings known. You felt better after that don't you. Once is enough to test waters. To gauge where do you stand at that point in time. When she gives positive/negative responses, it'd have been easier for you to move on right. BUT it's neither. So you shouldn't pop that question/confess to her anymore. Once is enough to get the anxiety off your back and let her know your intentions. You've got past stage one.

Like I mentioned she might not really know you well enough to trust you. Trust is not just about lunch and dinner dates. Or is it about roses and diamond necklaces (it works for some girls though) She doesn't know your family background, your friends, your financial background, your present problems etc. And all these equates to whether she sees a future between the two of you. She's the kind of girl I feel, who portrays herself as an independant girl but rather insecured when it comes to commitment. This is what usually happen to girls at this age: Feelings vs What they actually want.

Since she did not reject you outright earlier on means that she might have feelings for you. Based on the fact that most girls would just reject you straight without leaving you any room to breathe. But on the other hand, she's not sure if you're the kind of guy she's looking for or see a future in. She's considering you, yet keeping her options open.

More often than not, if you keep pushing her to a decision or rush into things, chances are, you'll get a red card from her. What I suggest you can do now is

For yourself

1. Spend more time with other things, e.g. Friends/family/studies/work

2. Focus on your goals and dreams. Your own life, not you and her life.

For her/the both of you

1. Be around for her, when you know her bad habits or weaknesses (not everyday see/call each other) e.g. if she's always late for sch/work, give her a morning call. If she has the habit of skipping meals, remind her. Do these by not jepordising your own time. It's about piorities.

2. Get her dependent on you or want to be reliant on you. This is the hard part. Yet the most effective method when things move beyond the stage of initial attraction. How? I leave it to you to find out.

By doing all these, you give her the space she needs, and shows her you're a patient and reliable person. You will slowly gain her trust that your interest for her is not just on a superficial level. Girls loved to be respected, not pushed. When you're focusing your time on improving your life, she sees you as a guy who is decisive and confident, someone who knows how to handle his life properly, thus being able to handle her and the love life if bound to be.

Friend, I used to have the same problem as you. Maybe you should just wait and see. Don't rush into things. It takes time to understand someone. The reason why she said she don't know you well enough is partly because of the way you both of you know each other. You guys lack mutual friends. Get to know her friends and introduce your friends to her as well. Trust is the key and needs to be build up slowly.