Originally posted by jojobeach:

Really ? Welcome back mom.. I thought you're dead ?

Your insolence brought me back to life. Let me sleep plsssssss. I'm going out liao. Laters. Have fun and be nice.

Originally posted by jojobeach:

Are you a dude or a dudette ?

I'm your mother.

Originally posted by jojobeach:

Duh bitch.

You bitch about her bitching about her mom to your mom. And yet you also bitch about your mother didn't ya ? Now what does that makes all of us ?

Ain't we all a bunch of bitches yes ?

Get a life bitch. At least that bitch is marrying your brother.. why don't you go find yourself a nice man and go bitch about his mom ?

 

 

Nuts. If we are all bitches then you should change ur name to "jojoBITCH"

edit: everytime a thread starts its inevitable to expect more bitching from other people rather than the useful advice you're looking for.

Originally posted by HelloKittyFan:

All in all, it's actually a family issue; do what u feel best and have no regrets.

I been thru similar situation as you, my mum will rather side an outsider than her own child me, cos my character was different from those of my siblings.

Whatever I said, she won't listen, but if an outsider said the same things as me, she will listen.

Our relationship was pretty bad to the extend that she told me is either she or me in the same house.

Ever hear a parent telling her own child that you are wasting my electricity cos u are using lights to study for ur exams?

Now, years later, no one will actually believed that we have conflicts that bad; we have grown closer and we seem more like friends.

Family is for Life; in all my entire life,  anyone who knows about the conflicts between my mum and me, they will just tell me 'oh please, u dun have to feel guilty, ur mum forced u to a corner, jus leave that house and live a life of ur own.'

I never leave, cos she's after all my mum, my siblings are still my siblings; we are family in this life, doesn't mean we will be again in the next, y not treasure what we have now.

u are still young, few yrs down the road, ur thinking will change. (",)

Disturbingly, its not you who changed but your mum rite? Why does this kind of nonsense shit keep happening?

To T.S: B1tches like indo-gal are vile and vicious and once in the family she can and will try to do more damage esp she knows u dun like her. Try to remain in your mom's good books and tolerate indo-gal. A snake can only hide her true colors for so long. Actually I've seen daughters-in-law dominate their mothers-in-law, i.e. my big aunt. So sadly (or happily cos i hate all my backstabbing relatives), my dad has been "kicked out" of the family. Although my granny knows she is wrong today, she is too scared to "defect". Hope it never gets to that stage.

Good luck to you and I hope you can win over your mom soon. I think bithching to your mom about her at this point will backfire since the marriage is your mom's idea. You can't win her over with small points. You need indo-gal to make a big time mistake. After all indo-gal "did so much" for your mom. Just remain in your mom's good books and be aware if indo-gal bitches about you to your mom behind your back.

Originally posted by Atobe:

If, for instance, you put in a Malay officer who's very religious and who has family ties in Malaysia in charge of a machine gun unit, that's a very tricky business. We've got to know his background... I'm saying these things because they are real, and if I don't think that, and I think even if today the Prime Minister doesn't think carefully about this, we could have a tragedy." - SM Lee Kuan Yew, Straits Times, September 19, 1999 on Malays in the Singapore Armed Forces

Despite the Singapore Pledge, there remains reservations.... at least Australia has put it upfront, and surely they do not want to be like UK - the defender of the Anglican Faith - having to admit that Syriah Law must be introduced to govern the growing population of Muslims in UK.

In WWII Americans Japs fought for the USA and despite public fears, NOT ONE defected or was a double agent.

Originally posted by palachan:

 

In the end....... still depend on Chelsea players AGAIN!  Looks like ManUre players are shit!  

Rooney dive here & there but can't even get a goal in 90+3mins.

J.Cole only need 3mins + to get both!

Aw.... Sounds like sour grapes to me. Still sore about the EPL and Champions league? It was good Joe Cole scored yesterday. Good thing Rooney didn't have to dive to win a penalty that Terry would slip and miss.

Chelski, you're not even the richest and not even champions. You're gonna be the next Tottenham. Man City's feeder club. That's why Robinho chose City over you =D

Originally posted by QX179R:

inflations leads to food prices increase & rental also increases..

the only thing that decreases - the food quality..

quantity also decrease. burgers are getting smaller.

Originally posted by R3D3V1L:

England doesn't expect

• Robbo Robson
• 8 Sep 08, 12:55 PM

Let's get the clichés out the way first. A win is a win. We'll take the three points. There are no easy games in international football. We all gave two million per cent.

Now let's get real. Andorra are rubbish. It's not surprising. All the men of marriable age play international football. Frankly there is no point whatsoever in a team like that playing dozens of qualifying matches.

They are about as likely to win an international football match as Andy Murray is to win a beauty pageant.

Andorra do not really play football - they play a football version of piling up the furniture against the door stop a baddie getting into your bedroom. It kind-of works too if the baddie in question is as witless as England.

But surely it's time that the minor nations - and I mean the ones that are not so much minnows as krill - can have their own pre-qualifying shindig and we can find out which one of San Marino, Liechtenstein, Luxemburg and Andorra and Scotland (joke!) are allowed to join the party.

Actually, I give it four years before England have a bit of pre-qualifying to do.
The question that really arises from Saturday - and might well be confirmed come Wednesday is this - is it time to accept that England are a poor football team?

There's not a bloke in that squad who can raise his game to the heights necessary, is there? Why is it that Lampard is still there, plying his horribly average trade when there must be a case for putting a bucket of cod in there in his stead?

Why is it that Rooney is a worse player now than when he was 17? Shrek is slowly but surely turning into the bloody donkey!

Look at the lad Murray last night - brilliant! How can a sportsman get progressively worse between the ages of 17 and 21?

Why is Beckham still there, mobile as a fencepost, when Walcott, Bentley, Agbonlahor, Young, Lennon, my mum, the bucket of cod's brother are all left out?

I like Becks, but he's done with and it's time the lad was left to his showbiz pals and we play a footballer on the right and not a brand.

Even a Boro fan has to accept that Stew Downing is not up to it at international level. Defoe is still a desperate pick, Heskey without Owen is pointless. All right Emile had a great season last year - three goals he scored - and he's honest. But that's it.

Until Joe Cole came on I've seen more wit and invention in a Jeremy Kyle monologue. Not that I saw the game live cos I'm one of millions who think Setanta is some sort of drab Eastern European car that runs on potato peelings.

Is it beyond the brainless trolls of terrestrial TV land to cough up for a highlights programme? Frankly you'd think Setanta would be paying us to watch highlights of Andorra v England any road.

I mean, ITV were happy to show the Soccer Aid farce last night on prime-time. Obviously it's great to raise the money for UNICEF but why does the attachment of the word "charity" to a big event seem to give permission for the product to be rubbish?

Actually I'm going to stop there cos if I'm honest I'm just gut-wrenchingly narked that Gareth Gates gets to share the Wembley turf with Romario and Figo and the rest of us sit around with envious faces trying to work out who the hell half the celebrities are.

Mind you Deayton marking Figo is more comprehensible than some of the omissions from the Fab squad.

Though they seem to turn the three lions on their chest into the toothless flea-bitten kind that mince along Yellow Brick Roads with the other friends of Dorothy, I'm not sure the players are entirely to blame.

No Ashton, no Agbonlahor, no Young, no Owen, no sense. At least there are some reasons for optimism.

Capello's obvious fury makes a welcome change from them tiny frowns from Sven and Smiley Steve's feeble brolly and coffee faff.

Two-up and Cole and Rooney start to coast around the place like it's job done. Good lad Fabio, give 'em a good old slagging.

But the fact is that this England side scares no one. Except their own fans. Ferdinand and Gerrard would help, even if Stevie G is bleating that he never got his favourite position ever.

Ask Paul Scholes if he thinks it's fair. I think Wednesday night against Croatia, that reality will bite and we'll finally realise that we're not good enough.

And that could - only could - result in England playing a brand of football that is, God help us, English.

Obviously we'll miss the scintillating continental style interplay between Terry, Lescott, Johnson and Cole at the back, with no one more than 200 yards near them.

But maybe a lot of pace, energy, direction, verve... you know, the way Liverpool play when Rafa wants them to win...the way Man Utd play...hell, the way Chelsea played in the opening game of the season might just mean that the team can become greater than the sum of its parts.

It does require that the players understand their roles - and that means 4-4-2. Dull yes, but then that matches an England footballer's mind. Remember when McClaren played a Donadonian 5-3-2 in Zagreb? A lot to ask of a team with the IQ of an armchair.

But when I think about England I feel like a bloke looking for a date at a supermodel convention - I'm just clutching at straws.

In fact let's just settle for supporting a Scot for a change. C'mon Murray, son.

 

 I used to hate England a lot because everyone are so unbearably cocky. From the fans to the media to the coaches. Remember the pre-match talks before they faced Croatia? How they dismissed Croatia. Now Capello has brought them down to earth so they shut up and worked hard against Andorra. But I can't help this is what England fans deserve if they keep showing their opponents such disrespect. What do they expect Andorra to do? If I face Mike Tyson in the ring, do i go defensive and hide or come out all punches flying? They should have just come out to do a professional job and win and let it be. If they get frustrated by defensive tactics then its their own failure not to be able to find the good final pass to the strikers. Face it England fans, your team was poor.

England doesn't expect

• Robbo Robson
• 8 Sep 08, 12:55 PM

Let's get the clichés out the way first. A win is a win. We'll take the three points. There are no easy games in international football. We all gave two million per cent.

Now let's get real. Andorra are rubbish. It's not surprising. All the men of marriable age play international football. Frankly there is no point whatsoever in a team like that playing dozens of qualifying matches.

They are about as likely to win an international football match as Andy Murray is to win a beauty pageant.

Andorra do not really play football - they play a football version of piling up the furniture against the door stop a baddie getting into your bedroom. It kind-of works too if the baddie in question is as witless as England.

But surely it's time that the minor nations - and I mean the ones that are not so much minnows as krill - can have their own pre-qualifying shindig and we can find out which one of San Marino, Liechtenstein, Luxemburg and Andorra and Scotland (joke!) are allowed to join the party.

Actually, I give it four years before England have a bit of pre-qualifying to do.
The question that really arises from Saturday - and might well be confirmed come Wednesday is this - is it time to accept that England are a poor football team?

There's not a bloke in that squad who can raise his game to the heights necessary, is there? Why is it that Lampard is still there, plying his horribly average trade when there must be a case for putting a bucket of cod in there in his stead?

Why is it that Rooney is a worse player now than when he was 17? Shrek is slowly but surely turning into the bloody donkey!

Look at the lad Murray last night - brilliant! How can a sportsman get progressively worse between the ages of 17 and 21?

Why is Beckham still there, mobile as a fencepost, when Walcott, Bentley, Agbonlahor, Young, Lennon, my mum, the bucket of cod's brother are all left out?

I like Becks, but he's done with and it's time the lad was left to his showbiz pals and we play a footballer on the right and not a brand.

Even a Boro fan has to accept that Stew Downing is not up to it at international level. Defoe is still a desperate pick, Heskey without Owen is pointless. All right Emile had a great season last year - three goals he scored - and he's honest. But that's it.

Until Joe Cole came on I've seen more wit and invention in a Jeremy Kyle monologue. Not that I saw the game live cos I'm one of millions who think Setanta is some sort of drab Eastern European car that runs on potato peelings.

Is it beyond the brainless trolls of terrestrial TV land to cough up for a highlights programme? Frankly you'd think Setanta would be paying us to watch highlights of Andorra v England any road.

I mean, ITV were happy to show the Soccer Aid farce last night on prime-time. Obviously it's great to raise the money for UNICEF but why does the attachment of the word "charity" to a big event seem to give permission for the product to be rubbish?

Actually I'm going to stop there cos if I'm honest I'm just gut-wrenchingly narked that Gareth Gates gets to share the Wembley turf with Romario and Figo and the rest of us sit around with envious faces trying to work out who the hell half the celebrities are.

Mind you Deayton marking Figo is more comprehensible than some of the omissions from the Fab squad.

Though they seem to turn the three lions on their chest into the toothless flea-bitten kind that mince along Yellow Brick Roads with the other friends of Dorothy, I'm not sure the players are entirely to blame.

No Ashton, no Agbonlahor, no Young, no Owen, no sense. At least there are some reasons for optimism.

Capello's obvious fury makes a welcome change from them tiny frowns from Sven and Smiley Steve's feeble brolly and coffee faff.

Two-up and Cole and Rooney start to coast around the place like it's job done. Good lad Fabio, give 'em a good old slagging.

But the fact is that this England side scares no one. Except their own fans. Ferdinand and Gerrard would help, even if Stevie G is bleating that he never got his favourite position ever.

Ask Paul Scholes if he thinks it's fair. I think Wednesday night against Croatia, that reality will bite and we'll finally realise that we're not good enough.

And that could - only could - result in England playing a brand of football that is, God help us, English.

Obviously we'll miss the scintillating continental style interplay between Terry, Lescott, Johnson and Cole at the back, with no one more than 200 yards near them.

But maybe a lot of pace, energy, direction, verve... you know, the way Liverpool play when Rafa wants them to win...the way Man Utd play...hell, the way Chelsea played in the opening game of the season might just mean that the team can become greater than the sum of its parts.

It does require that the players understand their roles - and that means 4-4-2. Dull yes, but then that matches an England footballer's mind. Remember when McClaren played a Donadonian 5-3-2 in Zagreb? A lot to ask of a team with the IQ of an armchair.

But when I think about England I feel like a bloke looking for a date at a supermodel convention - I'm just clutching at straws.

In fact let's just settle for supporting a Scot for a change. C'mon Murray, son.

haha... but i think behind the angry tone she makes some sense too.

160,000pounds a week. geez, i bet in jan there will be a flux of class acts into man shitty. but then even an all star team doesnt guarentee success. but who wouldn't want to join when offered such rediculous wages?

January will be so interesting. I wonder how long it is before we see blue shirts in Singapore that is not Chelsea's. I've NEVER seen anyone wearing a Citeh jersey before in Singapore.

The only team for me in manchester is RED!

Originally posted by gunner77:

BerbaGOD!!!

FERGUSEN'S RED ARMEH!

FERGUSEN'S RED ARMEH!

FERGUSEN'S RED ARMEH!

Originally posted by Tequila vodka:

On the other hand, as you say, she is a nice gal and you think it's just left with only your parents to approve then it would be a perfect picture. But what about in long run? If you never think of marryin this gal, why be together in the first place where you have to go through all these problems? My point is, don't rush to conclusion.

It's not just the race and religion but how you 2 are brought up in a very different family of rules and regulations. Are you sure there wont be any ways whereby you and your gf wont conflict in at all in future living together? Put it the other way round. Why is it not your gf giving in to you by converting out instead? You're doing it one-sided I guess. (correct me if I'm wrong)

Traditional chinese parents are always like that. Face comes first for traditional parents. How are they going to face their relatives and so on? Both parties have their dignity, reputation and principles to uphold. I'm in the same situation as you as well in some ways, but to avoid getting into getting "trouble" with my parents, my relationship is not disclosed to anyone cos my bf and I never know whether we will be marryin to each other in the end. It's not we don't believe in each other but shit happens sometimes. Therefore, we didn't want to upset anyone in the mean time, or go thru all the dramas at the moment., since everything is not comfirm yet till maybe we are really getting married as in till we are engaged or sth like tat. Imagine, (not cursing you) but if one day you and your gf broke up for some reason we never know, won't all these dramas between you and your parents esp your father, seems like you going through and fighting for nothin?

No matter what you choose, show respect and gratitude to your parents. They give you what you have, brought you up to the person you become. Is that how you're going to repay their kindness?

There are too many elements in life that you have to sacrifice sometimes cos of the decision you made. Love is not everything. Loving someone doesnt mean you have to possess him or her.

In the mean time, why not just enjoy life, enjoy what you have and appreciate it.

I said I wasn't going to reply to this thread anymore because some people do not understand what the thread was about in the first place. All they can see is the outrage of a son who has the audacity to go against his parents for the love of a malay girl.

Being filial is one thing. But know this, we are ultimately accountable to God. Treat your parents well is one thing. Obliging your parents when they are wrong is still a sin.

If your parents say "Don't friend this indian boy, indians are smelly."

Would you follow their wishes?

Same goes to "Don't date malay girls, malays are stupid."

Each of us has a moral compass in us that knows right from wrong. Traditions can be wrong. And it is fatal to our country if we keep clinging to those that are detrimental to our society. What happened to "regardless of race, language and religion"?

Racism can go both ways. But as a chinese. I am very aware that any chinese dating a malay or indian will face strong opposition from their family.

How would you feel if you dated a white british girl and her parents forbid her because you are a "chink" and therefore "inferior" or "unsuitable"? Is it an indignity to marry someone who is a malay or indian? What reputation is there to uphold? One as a racist? Fxxx that. Yes I am pissed off with all this "tradition" and "face" bullshit. Anyone suscribing to this, you're a FXXXXG RACIST. Hypocrites the bunch of you, complaining ang mohs are so arrogant and here you are putting other races down.

Is being Chinese in any way superior to indians or malays as Ang Mohs are superior to all of us? If two people are in love and can accept their differences, who can tell them otherwise?

This is surely my last post here. Nothing I say will change the minds of those who oppose or cling onto "traditions". I have obtained some good advice but also a lot of ranting from people who did not even read my question, let alone understand it.

If I dated a Brit, my parents would approve. Let's say her parents don't approve simply because I'm chinese. How will my parent's feel? Now, what do they think my girlfen's parents would feel if I accede to my parent's requests.

Whatever, I leave this debate to you guys. It's really pointless for me to carry on. Flame me or whatever I don't care. One post cannot change a lifetime of prejudiced values programmed into a person's brain. It takes too much effort. Effort I'm willing to put into my parents only.

when he bought city over, i told everyone that he was wooing the british public in case he was prosecuted in thailand.

DIE MAN SHITTY!!

Originally posted by yamizi:

That's why I said think through carefully. And I didn't say think overnight.

If it's what you want, then whichever religion that you choose would only be subjective truth and not objective truth.

Think about it, take care =)

that's the issue here, why am I not even allowed to date a malay girl? I never said I'm getting married. I am thinking things through very carefully.

dumbdumb! is right. I already know what I want.

What i've got from this debate is:

1. I ought to pay more attention to what my parents think

2. Ways to make my parents accept her

3. Some disapproval, insults, rude jokes about circumcision

Well obviously only two categories were important to me. I thank you all for your help. I really do not expect to learn anymore at this point. Bye bye.

Originally posted by cheekycheng:

u claim that your father dont try to see what u see but have u tried to see what he see?

u prepared to convert to muslim for her sake but is she willing to give up on islam?

sounds like u think nothing of your parents. now watch your words about your parents, hybride.

i said before i know what he thinks. now things would be a lot less controversial if i were to convert to say Christianity. you know it. if people are usually able to convert to Christianity, Catholism, Bhuddism, Taosim... why the fuss over Islam?

you dont know my parents, you dont know my girlfren, you dont know me.

Now watch your words? Please I won't even bother. Its a forum. Say what you want. People replying here will vary from the ultra-traditionalist chinese to the ones who will sympathise with my plight.

If you want to take sides its your perrogative. But I'm here to look for a peaceful solution to make everyone happy in the end. So if you cant help, try not to bother me with your words while riding on a high horse.

Originally posted by yamizi:

Now the issue is converting one's belief. It's really much indepth question that one has to consider.

Faith and patience in what?  

If poor, then work hard for the monie and it's settled. It's one's belief system we're talking about here.

In order to give in to GF, sacrifice the family tradition? Of course this is up to individual, he has to think this issue through very carefully.

 

And someone earlier on mentioned about the diet isuse, becoming a muslim is not just a matter of diet. In fact, changing one's belief to another is a change of perspective, attitude and even lifestyle, not just diet that simple.

we take small steps first right? no one decides to convert to any religion overnight. you have to start somewhere, and decide if its what you really want.

Originally posted by yamizi:

Free-thinker is a belief itself. So in the past you don't believe in the existence of a God, so now because of your GF you going to start believing there's a God?

I always believed I would find God one day. Free thinker does not mean i'm an atheist. Dude, check what you say first =)

Originally posted by RachelSniper:

R3D, I empathise with you. I went out with a guy my then-alive dad disliked.

Despite the family's rejections (said he is not rich, not well educated, blah blah blah), I still went out with him, thus developing a serious relationship with him.

My dad and the rest of the family learnt to slowly accept him as part of my life and I was heartened.

I never regretted with anything so far up to this point.

I went through with insults from relatives and still am.

What to do? I like him and I want him. I will do anything for him, even had stupid thoughts of committing suicide when certain issues arised between us. 

Are you as crazy as I am? As devoted and perhaps blind like me?

Sorry if I sounded like a freakish Joker-wannabe. Lol... Tends to get into matters over my head.

 

 

I hate relatives by the way. You see them once in a while and they tell you how you've grown, how handsome you are and how smart that you got into university. They then proceed to talk behind your back. You don't love your cousins, they view you as competition to beat in life. Who is the smartest, the richest...

The disease of the old generation still infects some of the younger generation today. No love in family. Good thing you ignored their insults. Because they would love nothing better than to see you fall.

I'm not crazy. I just won't compromise my principles. I'm stubborn.

I'm not sure about you guys out there. But my extended family is like this. Fxxxed up.

Originally posted by dumbdumb!:

haha because.. muslim is the identity of the religion a person practices.. and chinese is a race.

so you can convert to muslim, but not to chinese lol.

=D

Originally posted by yamizi:

How come cannot convert your GF to chinese but must convert yourself to become a muslim?

i guess some people have renounced Islam before. But why should I ask her to do that? I am a free thinker after all. If I can find in my heart the desire to embrace Islam I will marry her. It will not happen unless she's the kind that hates the practices of her religion, loves to drink and fav food is char siew. Yes I have a muslim friend like that =D

Originally posted by angel7030:

hahaha...guess yr Dad may answered, " Really, i can marry her?? Son, can you help me on just one thing, eh...you dun mind handle your mommy for me please"

~morning~

she's almost perfect. good girl, studious, caring, pretty, CHINESE. But no chemistry lei. She too quiet le. I'm quiet but sometimes crazy. A bit sian with her.

I'll say, "Sure dad. But you know if you become muslim you can have up to 4 wives?"

He so rich drive big car sure can get young pretty girls if he wants =p

My mom was nearby so he dun dare to say anything =D

Originally posted by RachelSniper:

At least your parents knew, right?

Give them some times and keep your dates on the low. Which I did not mean as "keeping quiet" but maintaining low key while on dates with her.

You can try to bring her home (not into your bedroom, ok...) frequently so that your parents would get to see and talk to her often.

Hiding her in the bedroom might deteriorate any trust between you and your parents.

If you love her, bear with it with her.

Or else, just give up the relationship like some people do. Sad.

I will never give up because of my parents. Was pissed off but sad now. Like something weighs heavy on my heart cos my dad again said something not nice yesterday. But he doesnt try to understand me. To him, I'm just a boy blinded by love.

Originally posted by angel7030:

your parents marry her or you??

 

if cannot approve, use the shot gun method. aiyo, guy, sebei cham. Can get honour, master, PhD, but when come to relationship, most failed. D++

I'm wondering if one day i'll just out of the blue tell my dad, "Pa, I'm getting married."

My dad likes one of the girls i dated, a chinese. I always tell him, "You like her so much you marry her la!" in a joking manner.